Life on Almosta Ranch

Stories of ranch life and other silly musings of an old codger

David McClain

David McClain
Location
Doniphan, Missouri, USA
Birthday
February 08
Bio
I am a simple man who has lived a simple life for sixty years. I have not dined with movie stars nor Kings and Queens. I have not walked the halls of power, nor have I been a mover and a shaker. I have, however, been a soldier, a tinker, a jack of all trades. I have raised five children....I have been loved and I have loved. I do not see grand designs nor do I chase afer them. Instead, I listen to the heartbeat of the land and I rejoice in a bird's song in the morning. Do not come here seeking answers for I have none. I do have questions which I will ask you constantly though. I do not believe in aruging so Politics will not be discussed in my blog. I do not care what your personal beliefs are for you are free to believe as you will...please allow me to do likewise. I have never been rich, but I have always been poor. Being poor however has never stopped me from feeling rich. I feel rich because I have the love of a good woman. Melinda completes me. She gives me the peace of mind and soul required to write about life without regrets and without envy of those who might have more. She is my world. Almosta Ranch is our heaven and we are happiy. This is what I want to share with you in this blog.

MY RECENT POSTS

David McClain's Links

Salon.com

Those of you who have the stomach to read more than two or three of these little tales of mine must think that being a People-Greeter is the worse job in all of Wal-Mart.

You would be wrong.

There is one job which is light-years ahead of mine in theRead full post »

*Note: The Wally Files are stories from the old blog of my alter-ego, Wally M. Geezer. Wally writes about Wal-Mart, his home life, and his old friends in Buzzard Neck, Texas and always with humor. I hope you enjoy this series of stories and most of all, I hope you getRead full post »

 Wally MWally M. Geezer Circa 2009

Back in 2009 I was a new member of Open Salon. Brimming with ideas and a boundless enthusiasm for the writing craft, I hit the ground running. Slowly, ever so slowly and over a number of months, I built up a very small following…people who cameRead full post »

AUGUST 13, 2012 3:06PM

"High and Tight"

 Photobucket

“High and tight, Pops; give that boy a man’s haircut.”

A couple of months ago I heard my father’s voice echo in my head. I was sitting in a barber’s chair in downtown Doniphan. Now for years my wife has taken care of my haircuts but on thisRead full post »

It happened about sixty-two days ago and last night it was finished. Neither Mel or myself slept more than an hour last night as this natural order of things played out to its inevitable conclusion.

As I said, it all started two months ago and I remember the day vividly.Read full post »

AUGUST 2, 2012 1:57PM

Men are Such Pigs!

 Photobucket

That title is a true statement as any woman will be quick to tell you and because we are all pigs at heart, then it is your's truly who gets to take care of Gator when he needs a little exercise.

 Gator, the head He-Pig of Almosta Ranch, needs to… Read full post »

JULY 31, 2012 1:10PM

Graduation Day

Two weeks ago today our little boy, Toby graduated with honors from Almosta Ranch’s beginning course. You can read more about Toby, the little colt that could, here.

To say that Toby was a fighter is a gross understatement. Rejected by his mother at birth, we didn’t expect himRead full post »

JULY 25, 2012 1:44PM

I almost made it

I almost made it. The planning was flawless, it was the execution that fell short. Compared to my Plan, the Normandy Invasion seemed like a spur-of-moment jaunt across the Channel for a day trip.

All I had to do was to catch the Hillbilly Limited, leaving Poplar Bluff at two-thirty the… Read full post »

JULY 4, 2012 3:38PM

This Old House

Today is the Fourth of July and I have spent the morning reading blogs concerning the holiday. I was struck by the number of folks who wrote about how they wished they lived somewhere else. Some were celebrating the fact that they had left this land of oppression to find homes in… Read full post »

JUNE 28, 2012 9:34AM

There Once Was a Place

        Photobucket  

  OakTree

There once was a place , a magical place for those who knew of it. It didn’t really have an official name but was called simply the River Bottom by those like me who loved it.

To be more precise, it was a stretc… Read full post »

JUNE 24, 2012 1:07PM

Gator is in da house!

For all intents and purposes I have been rendered computerless   for the past week. My laptop is in Intensive Care and we just got Mel’s working yesterday.

With two laptops sick, we were forced to our final fallback plan…..a ten year old desktop that hadn’t even been turRead full post »

JUNE 19, 2012 12:42PM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVE

She is an absolute treasure and she is the reason I get out of bed every morning with a smile on my face, no matter how I feel.

She is a kind and gentle spirit to whom people and animals alike are drawn to. I have watched in disbelief as… Read full post »

JUNE 13, 2012 3:43PM

Stop your damned whining!

                                    Photobucket

Oh please, just stick a sock in it will you. I am sick to death of your whining anRead full post »

JUNE 11, 2012 1:39PM

The Usual Suspects

The victim lay on the back porch, body ripped and torn and barely recognizable as Mel’s faithful companion, Ms. Shoe….first name House. We both stood over the body in muted horror. It had been quite some time since a crime of this level of violence had happened here on… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
MAY 31, 2012 4:19PM

To the Grandchildren of my Grandchildren

I posted this in 2009, shortly after joining OS.  The project it pretty much complete now and upon my death my children will be given copies to pass along to their children. 

 Four years ago I sat down and wrote the first of what, so far has been five letters toRead full post »

MAY 29, 2012 1:13PM

Unrequited Love

A few folks who have come to know me through this blog have expressed their envy of the fact that I live on a horse ranch surrounded by beautiful creatures. I will concede the fact that I am indeed surrounded by beautiful animals but there is one very important part ofRead full post »

Three years ago I was new to the site and I posted one of my short stories which garnered six rates and four comments which surprised and pleased me to no end. So I figured I would repost it today to celebrate the OS Fiction Weekend. I hope you enjoy theRead full post »

MAY 24, 2012 3:20PM

A Plea for help from Libya!

Today I received this heartfelt plea for help via my Open Salon in-box.

Attn: Dear Mr Torman, (She didn't get the memo that I no longer blogged under that name I guess)

Good Day and My compliment to you and your entire household,My name is Mrs Zainab Ahmed i am contact… Read full post »

Around Almosta, when Mel yells out from the front porch that dinner is ready I come running, just like I did as a little boy and Momma use to call me inside to eat.

The same is true for all the animals on the ranch....When Momma calls, they come running.

They… Read full post »

Yesterday I was reminded once again why I would never live anywhere but in the country. Out here where the roads are often dirt and there’s a ten mile trek to the nearest store to get milk and bread, there is an element of self-reliance that runs deep in the people.Read full post »

MAY 19, 2012 11:22AM

Meet Toby.....Pictures of the baby

Toby at six hours old.....

DSC_5486

Toby at two days old after we taught him to drink from a bowl...

DSC_5488

Surrogate mom leading Toby back to the barn after a feeding session. If we manage to keep this baby alive for seven days, he may just make it...with some luck.… Read full post »

MAY 18, 2012 10:00AM

Update on the new baby.

Day two has dawned and the colt is still with us. We are hand feeding him every three hours around the clock. About two o’clock this morning I told Mel we needed to just give up on the struggle to get the mom to feed the baby and concentrate on gettingRead full post »

Won't be online much today, the life of a rancher demands my time. Six hours or so ago one mare had a foal. The mother rejected the baby. At the same time another mare, our best brood mare, who has no baby this year, stepped in and took over the baby.… Read full post »

MAY 16, 2012 9:44AM

When your child steals from you

As much as it pains me to admit it, the fault for this sad state of affairs lay solely with my wife, Mel. It is a fact that she has always favored her baby boy over all our other children and she has not been able to stop herself fromRead full post »

MAY 12, 2012 1:50PM

I Share My Wife With Others

Every man likes to think that he is the center of his wife’s universe, the sole recipient of her love and affection. Unfortunately nothing could be further from the truth when it comes to my wife, Melinda.

I’m not complaining mind you, I knew the truth going into theRead full post »