Tinkerertink69

Tinkerertink69
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Your closet, Indiana, France
Birthday
July 16
Title
President and CEO of Your Mom
Company
Your closet
Bio
Smell my Paws! Does that smell like poo to you? Writer? No way! I'm a guy with a cat who knows my passwords and likes to blog!! What? Oops, I mean, I'm a cat who likes to blog. Smell my paws!!! French prostitutes? Only on Tuesdays!! Lets cuddle!!

Tinkerertink69's Links

Salon.com
JANUARY 7, 2011 7:12PM

Who on Cover? TINK ON COVER!! Full disclosure ---

Rate: 51 Flag

This post is dedicated to the replacement Ed I Tor while Emily, our fearless leader and full time Ed, was on vacation. 

Most people would be declared insane just by accepting the position as this place, Open.Salon, is a mad house on its best days and a funeral home on others.

Take that as a compliment my friends, I do.

Michael Humphrey, though not his real name(I discovered it was really Cindee Rogers and she's a super model --- take that for full disclosure!) stepped into some mighty big shoes to fill and as a temporary Ed I Tor, he knew the worse thing Kerry and Joan could do to him was to have him rubbed out by a Mob hit.

Michael tried to make soup sound like a grand open kitchen challenge like a true pro, as seen here, and who could disagree, soup is pretty sexy.

The kitchen challenges though are dumb.  Gawd, those are like so 2007!!!!!!

But I digress.

I messaged Michael last night stating I thought he had sexy eyes. 

Yes, I had a few, read that as a lot, of beers in me when I did but today, he replied back with a nicely worded message of hope.

"What the hell, I'm going to put you on the front cover today, what are they going to do, fire me?"

I thought he was joking but then he did call me 'The Mayor of Open.Salon' which I rapidly put on my resume.

Nobody reads the damn thing anyways, so what the hell, right?

But then, I went to my blog before I decided to drink more beer and go outside to potty and there, on my best work of fiction since 'I WAS A TEENAGE DRAG QUEEN....' I noticed an EDITOR'S PICK.

And then I rushed to the cover.  Oh my lord! As my granny who isn't really my granny would say, "That fool done lost his mind!!!!"

cover1 

My BLURRY FACE ON THE FRONT COVER!!!

Of course, I have to make full disclosure  that the choice was actually done under threat I would piss on his roses if I wasn't put on the cover but hey, whatever gets the job done.

Also under full disclosure(stupid federal laws), I must also announce that I've been stalking the Palin brothers(HI TRIG!! HI NANA!!) for years and discovered some pretty interesting things about them.

According to Google, both of them died a few years ago.  Sad but true.

Anyways, Michael, if Colorado doesn't work out, always remember, you'll always have a place on the second worse news agency, Lesbian Lunch, waiting for you. 

Yes, the pay sucks, the benefits are non-existing and every so often, you'll have to write erotic Christian fiction using a donkey as the main character, but all in all, it's a sweat shop of news!

Good night and have a better tomorrow....

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I tried to post this THREE TIMES as a comment on your cover story, but it wouldn't take - even tho it appeared in the feed. Something's fishy. Here's what I tried to post:

HOLY SHIT!! So you musta slipped some of that acid to Ed I Tor??? Or did I get a few flecks of it somehow?? Maybe Cranky IS right - APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SHIT!!

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! ! !

farrrrrrr out...maaaaaaan....
HOLY SHIT!! So you musta slipped some of that acid to Ed I Tor??? Or did I get a few flecks of it somehow?? Maybe Cranky IS right - APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SHIT!!

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! ! !

farrrrrrr out...maaaaaaan....
This morning, someone gave me a pamphlet about the Apocalypse. Then I see the Open Salon cover. Coincidence?

- going to look for my helmet...
Oh, I'm glad you explained it. I thought I'd gotten a bad batch of LSD.
Damn lemme try posting my comment for the sixth straight time:

HOLY SHIT!! So you musta slipped some of that acid to Ed I Tor??? Or did I get a few flecks of it somehow?? Maybe Cranky IS right - APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SHIT!!

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! ! !

farrrrrrr out...maaaaaaan....
I thought somehow I had gotten burned by synthetic sleight of hand....
Tink on cover? Break out the bubbles.
Why is the cell phone picture bigger than your head?

`R
So, I wasn't hallucinating????

Lezlie
HOLY SHIT!! So you musta slipped some of that acid to Ed I Tor??? Or did I get a few flecks of it somehow?? Maybe Cranky IS right - APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SHIT!!

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! ! !

farrrrrrr out...maaaaaaan....
dammit, tink, i was counting on the end around 2012. not just yet.
Emily can stay away on vacation as your tag??:)
LOL
CONGRATS and rated with hugs
Lets see...

Thousands of dead birds falling from sky? CHECK
Thousands of dead fish floating to shore? CHECK
Tink on the cover of OS? CHECK

Yup. It's the Apocalypse...
michael just thought you were a cute pussy. kitty. you know.
Catherine, Helmets are good! Wait, what?

Cranky, yeah, I figured I better explain the whole thing, you know, full disclosure!!!

Mission, yeah, but just to be careful, don't drink anymore water!! :D

Kathy, ~BLOWS BUBBLES~ PARTYYYYYY!! :D

Amy, boohoohoo!! But I like soup!! WAAAA! Damn soup nazis!! ;D

Larry, big phone??? :D

L, you sure weren't!! WOOOO!! I am...different topic!! :D

Major, I'm sorry, but I wanted the end sooner, 2011 just seems like a good year for the earth to end!! :D
I've already registered my shock and amazement on your other post. Now you're just milking the pony.
Linda, she deserves a long break!! ;D

Amy, EXACTLY!! Everyone prepare yourself!! Boohooohoo!!

femme, I am a cute pussy cat!! ~nodding~ :D
Gabby, wait, you been on my web cam site? Thanks!! :D
I heard they just fired him.
The Mayor of Open.Salon? I hope you use Marion Barry as your model. Because you know what that means, COCAINE and HOOKERS all the time.
Congrats on the EP.
Yes, Tink, today WAS a history making day. Your first EP of the year - what a kick off !
john, from a cannon!! He'll be missed!! :( ~grin~

Anthony, exactly!! Cocaine and hookers for EVERYBODY!! :D

Fusun, so far, it has been a good year!! WOOO!! :)
ok, the world's equillibrium has been restored temporarily.
Mime, exactly, I had to write this post so the world wouldn't implode. I'm just not ready yet for that to happen!! :D
Congrats to the great Tink, mayor of Open Salon (oh that's what OS stands for?), um, yay!
Tinky tinky you depraved pussy!!!! I love you really I do... You complete me! Wait! What? ;D
No really
Rated it!
At this moment, Tink, you have two of the top rated posts in the "Top Rated" list. And you only posted once today. I don't know if anyone has ever done that on Open Salon. At least, I have never seen it in the time I have been here. I had better take a screen shot of this. Emily will not believe me without evidence.
It's an after-Christmas miracle.~r
Now do you suppose my comment will post? Let's see:

HOLY SHIT!! So you musta slipped some of that acid to Ed I Tor??? Or did I get a few flecks of it somehow?? Maybe Cranky IS right - APOCALYPSE!!! HOLY SHIT!!

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! ! !

farrrrrrr out...maaaaaaan....
No matter how it happened, it was well-deserved! Congratulations!
Apocalyptic rebellion of nature, and capped by an EP cover for Tink, Gaaak, it's the end!!!!!
The living end Tinkmeister!
This might get you a 2 minute sitting with the maestro.
Duane, I thought OS stood for Only Sexy. Learn something new every day!! :D

white and black, ~TEARS~ I lust after you as well. ~smooch~ ~L~

Catherine, ~nodding~ I know, best day ever for me on here!! SWOON!! :D

nana, damn right I am!! Oops, I meant, I AM NOT!! pffffft!! :D

Joan, ~nodding~ Hallmark channel should be notified!! :D

Alysa, thank you very much!

Fred, we should probably run now!! :D

iq, best dating site EVER!! Or worse. Matters who you ask!! :D

Larry, I know, spankings galore!! WOOOO!! Wait, what? :D
Michael, you won't survive the erotic Christian field then damn it!! ;D
scupper, thank you!!! :)
Whoooo-hooooo!!!!! hot damn Tink!!
So I just checked the Top Rated and Tink is both #1 and #2 at the same time. I'm in awe.
AHH!!! CATS!!!

You've been smokin that serious shit again, haven't you?
This only proves you are "TOP CAT" !!!!!!! I was loving seeing you popped up there dude!
I guess there's more than one way to skin a cat. What? Oh. Sorry. This beats everything you've done before. What? Oh. Sorry. Never mind. Ed will probably sober up by Sunday.
Well Tink it appears you have made it over the hump; that is at least with Michael Hump....hrey. Nice job.
R
aha, now I understand.
Relax Tink, Relax!

Everybody is just all delighted and joyous cause hell froze over........


(*Of course me too*)
(*Where did you hide the Hustler - I got all scratched up by them thorn bushes looking for it*)
Ooh Tink, you naughty crazy kitty you! Tuna for you tonight. :)

Rated
Shitfire! I got on there also, I was flying from NM when I landed guys in sunglasses were all over the place talking to their jacket collars while looking in my direction. I think all my post did was piss about 600 people off. Emily's back now we'll have to wait another year. Good Job Tink.........o/e PFFRRRRRATED++++++++++++++
Whoooo Hoooooo! It seems your mug is everywhere! Congrats! R-
Based on the current stock price, I figured you took your last unemployment check and bought the company. Kind of a Rupert Murdoch of the blogosphere.

Nice work, you crazy bastard.
Cue the balloons! Release the white doves! Oh, that was just like when I worked at Disney and cued off some celebratory effects. Gives me the shivers...
Tink, this is great!! What a fun way to start off the New Year!
Tink--the end times. . . You started it!!!!! Wanders off to buy water, gold, and ammo.
Let's see. Emily goes on vacation, and you and I both make the cover. Something stinks in Chinatown! (it could be the fried cat tails they cook)
GACK! The *last* thing I want to see is Tink's full disclosure. If you get my drift.

Yes, Michael has done a stand-up job as interim editor. I hope they thank him appropriately.

Damn cat.
I was out early and home late...sort of like a bad kitty. YAY! Hell has frozen over at last!!! .....Throws anchovies into the air!
Anthony Duval has related you to Marion Barry because of hookers and cocaine. While I was going to compare your mayorality to Bedlam, he made the connection to Washington, DC.

Tink as Mayor of Congress. Somehow, it all makes some kind of sick f--ing sense.
Just checking to see if I'm still banned from commenting here. And NO, I am not the maestro!
Yaaay. For so many reasons!
Julie, ~nodding~ Yesterday, my ego went sky rocketing!! Wooooo!! :D

Cranky, and it was good. Though I doubt I could handle such an event again. Do you know I'm the Anti-Christ? I didn't!! :D

Boomer, only the good stuff for me! WOOOO!! :D

Sheila, me too! It was awesome. Now I'm good for a year or two!! :D

grif, yeah, it's Cartoon Saturday, so well, I'm off, but it's all good, I feel great!! Wooooo!! :D

Limb, exactly, now, everything can go back to normal!! :D

Inverted, nuclear science!! :D

vzn, what? Cat needed an ego boost. PFFFFT!! ;D

sky, the newest untouched Hustler is in the mail box, usual place, behind the new drugs!! ~:D

merwoman, TUNA!! HURRAY!! :D

Fett, ahhh thanks, coming from you, I take that as a compliment!! ;D Love ya too!!!! My ego needed a boost though, it was getting low, to the point I was getting ready to write about ice water enemas!!

Now, I shall write what matters....ICE WATER ENEMAS!! :D

o/e, I know!! Right? Sometimes you got piss off folks, it gets their blood going!! :D

Dave, I like your ole Army buddy, he got something!! :D

Gwool, I'll wait a few more days before making the official announcement!! ;D

Linnnn, I LOVE BALLOONS!! WOOOOO!! :D

designanator, exactly!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!! :)

nola, don't forget the batteries!! :D

scanner, ~nodding~ I know, it was like chaos yesterday. Glad it'll be back to normal soon. TEARS!! :D

boaner, I heard they sent a limo and got him some new shoes(concrete) and everything. Wonder where he went? :D

Muse, YEA!! How did you know I was hungry?? ;D

old new lefty, exactly!! Woooooo!! :D

Matt, I told the Comment Police to unban ya!! Somehow they had you confused for a terrorist!! I know, awful!! :D

trig, exactly!!! I didn't understand it either!! :D
You are an OS ICON my friend! Glad I got to see your blurry face!
Who off the cover? You off the cover and soon me too.. Sigh fame and glory be an evil misstress, she teases with her EP only to taketh away
Fett, I'm bringing it ole school!! ;D

Sparking, ~nodding~ I didn't want to be, but I'll take it!! :D Thank you!!!

**Taking a bow** :D

white and black, ~pout~ Yeah, I was cut down in my prime by Cartoon Saturday and good taste!! :D

Dog, roowf!! :D