“I’m going to go say something,” P says, gaging my reaction with her eyes as she slowly rises up from our table, her bun of black curls bobbing with every move.  “NO!” I snipe back in the most authoritative whisper-yell I could muster.  “Fine,” she says sit… Read full post »

I spent the bulk of last Sunday sitting in my friend’s living room on her overstuffed tan couch listening to NPR and trying to break free of the writer’s block that has seemed to consume me for the better part of the last few months.  I really do have a lot… Read full post »

A year in the life…

 

A year ago today (tonight) is when it all went down.  It is hard to believe how fast time has gone, and how much has changed.  A year ago today was the day my whole world collapsed—but a year ago today also marks the… Read full post »

I apologize for my absence.  Life has been busy.  I had to take a test—a BIG one and so I took the month of February away from writing as I had to study.  A lot.  Every night.  In a few months I will know whether or not it paid off.  I… Read full post »

These past few weeks I have been sad.  At first, I didn’t know why.  I chalked it up to post holiday blues or the cold weather coupled with the short days…and then I looked at the calendar.  It is late January.  A year ago in late January was when I first… Read full post »

I have to say, Sunday nights are always the hardest.  I remember when I first became single, my mother told me it would be Sunday nights that would be the worst, and oh was she right. 

Sunday nights are– or at least they were for making (or more realistically going out… Read full post »

The more I date, the more I know that Joe was not the right man for me—but the more that I date, the more I realize that I am not over what has happened, I am not over the deceit and betrayal and pain.  Some days I miss him still.  It’s… Read full post »

I saw a ghost on Saturday—a ghost of my past life.  At least I am pretty sure I did. 

In the midst of my Saturday morning errand run I stopped at the gas station to fill up.  I was at the pump, waiting for the pump to accept my credit card… Read full post »

“So are you looking for a relationship?†he said, his barstool turned toward me, his knees touching mine.  A moment passes, then two. 

“I, uhh….I…†I say sounding dumbfounded as if he asked me some deep philosophical question.  I can’t seem to get out an answer.  I’ve only had hal… Read full post »

Dear Joe,

It’s almost Christmas.  Can you believe it has been so long?  Some days it seems like it’s been forever, while others seem like it hasn’t yet been long enough.  I mourn the good times but am not yet ready to look back on them with affection.  Sometimes, although admittedly… Read full post »

Well readers, as you may or may not have guessed, I have slowly but surely wading my way back into the dating pool. 

After this whole ordeal I have become considerably more cautious.  I mean I can do a date or two with someone but after that all bets are off. … Read full post »

I am not the biggest Ke$ha fan (infact it pained me just to put that dollar sign in there) but THIS is an amazing cover of an already amazing song… And had it come out back in March it would have been on repeat for hours on end.  I just… Read full post »

I am not sure if many of you are familiar with the new movie “Shame” that just recently came out.  It feels like ignoring it would be doing an injustice to all that I have written about sex addiction– yet watching it and expaining it makes me feel physically sick. 

I… Read full post »

As I have said, I was away for awhile due to being really busy with my class…here is part of a chapter I re-did.  For you faithful readers, it may sound familiar but it is much more cleaned up:

7. Revelations

“Emily, I’m a sex addict,†the words just hang in… Read full post »

With every changing of the seasons I get a bit misty, sometimes finding myself looking back on what I was doing a year ago at this time, or two years ago at this time or THREE years ago at this time.  But, with each season, I find that things  have gotten… Read full post »

Lately, I have been struggling with the idea of Dating.  Mainly, how can I date.  I know I have addressed this topic before but it honestly haunts me.  I have this part of me, this blog, my writing, COSA…that while I openly discuss here, I don’t exactly share with people I… Read full post »

I have been doing pretty well.  Yes, I have my ups and downs just like anyone in my situation should but I think I am actually doing okay.  I’ve fully acclimated myself back  into society, I’ve been going out with friends and have finally been feeling like I have my life… Read full post »

As the holiday season quickly approaches, I am now forced one of the most trying times for a single [cat] parent.  What to do with Lily over the holidays.  Growing up with cats, I have learned to just give them a surplus of food and water and hope for the best… Read full post »

Almost guaranteed the number 1 place NOT to meet men is going to be the waiting room at your therapists office. 

For the past 7.5 months I have been visiting the same therapist on the same day, at the same time.  She shares an office with about 12 other therapists so… Read full post »

I met a guy this weekend.  He wanted my number.  Still not being terribly enthusiastic about this whole dating thing, I gave him my screen name on words with friends instead.  We have been in the midst of a shit-talking gruge match for 3 days.  It is highly entertaining.

Read full post »

 I have been going in circles for weeks–months actually with my therapist about how I can not hate Joe, how I can remember the good times for being so good and somehow keep them clean and shiny and untarnished by the massive amount of awful things that followed.  She suspects it… Read full post »

I found this article in the Atlantic today… Is it the truth, or just one woman’s take as to why she’s still single?  You decide…

All the Single Ladies

I’ve tried to ignore it.  I’ve tried to pretend I don’t remember, or that today is a day of no significance.  But the truth is it is.  Today is Joe’s birthday.  

As much as I try to hate him, I still have this complex when it comes to Joe.  I see… Read full post »

As my last blog post suggested, I was notified by some of my most loyal readers that they needed more.  I agree.  Part of the reason I have been hesitant to post is becuase I have been busy, really busy but also because I am afraid that hearing day after day,… Read full post »

Okay! I get it I need to write more often! And I promise I will! I have stories of dating misfortune past and running out of gas on the freeway to share! I have so much I want to say and so much I will tell… Except right now… Read full post »