Yoohoo....Robert? Is that you in the box?" 

Shirley Finklestein poked her head  all the way into the window of  the four by four foot cublicle.

“Aunt Shirley! What are you doing here?” Robert was working his daily shift selling tickets at the Whale Watching booth. "You… Read full post »

"Relax Shirley, we have plenty of time." Saul said as he buttered another roll. "Sit with me a little longer."

It was Wednesday, "All-You-Can-Eat Spaghetti Night" at the Fresh Meadows Diner. An event the Finklesteins rarely missed.

"I know Saul, but Betty is saving me a seat. Right in… Read full post »

"Do you know  you have a twenty-five dollar gift certificate hanging  over the toilet in your bathroom?" Betty asked. "Why haven't I ever seen that before?"

"How much time do you spend in my bathroom?" Shirley replied as she dun… Read full post »

2011? Who invited 2011 to the party?

It wasn't me. 

They say old friends are the best friends....I would happily invite some of my old friendly years to come back for a visit.

 1966: Started college. the universities weren't ready for the Baby Boomers so our school consisted of thirty… Read full post »

"Who me?" Shirley Finkelstein turned around and looked at the  woman holding a clipboard.

"Yes, you dear," the woman replied. " My name is Carolyn Applebee. I represent I See You Productions. We are at the Fresh Meadows Shopping Mall today casting for a commercial. Would you by any chance… Read full post »

"It would have been thirty-four years today," sighed Shirley Finklestein."

"What woulda been thirty-four years?" Betty asked.

"My wedding anniversary." She explained. "Saul, may he rest in peace and I would have been celebrating today."

 "So what are you doing tonight?" Betty asked.

"What shoul… Read full post »

"Just draw what you see." the teacher said as she pointed to the still life. "Just draw what you see."

"Oh, I ain't so good at this," Shirley Finkelstein told her neighbor. "My picture's gonna look like scribble scrabble."

"Now Shirley," the teacher said. "Don't be so hard on yourself." … Read full post »

"Don't forget, "Over Fifty Bowling Night" at Lois Lanes on Sunday."

Shirley Finklestein loved to go to "Over Fifty Ladies Bowling" every week. Free shoe rentals...and a chance to see all her girlfriends.

"Not comin' this week, Shirley," her friend Betty said."Gonna try the Singles Mixer at the Commun… Read full post »

"...so I take it you thought you were  kissing Harold this evening?" the tall man asked .

" Why on earth would you care if I were kissing  Harold?" she answered innocently.

"Because," he replied, "Don't you know that my twin brother Harold is on a fishing trip … Read full post »

"All right. Alright. I'm up goddam it," Arthur yelled at the alarm clock as he slowly lifted his legs off of the cot and onto the floor. "I'm up. I'm up."

 The Great Arthur Foy performed  every Saturday night in a one man show for a small appreciative audience. He found… Read full post »

"Hey Annie!" yelled an older woman carrying an oversized garment bag and a purse loaded with snacks.

"Hey Betty." Annie called to her. "Seems like every  old broad who owns an evening gown is here," she said as they both entered the cavernous sound stage.

Weigh… Read full post »

"Oh my Gawd," Ceil said to herself. "Where did the  time go?"

She knew she had to be on the twelve-fifteen to Mount Vernon. She also knew she had to iron her black dress and find her black shoes.

She knew.

But she also knew that the macaroni and cheese  wouldn't bake… Read full post »

"Can you get to Columbia Studios in twenty minutes?" my agent Steve asked me. I was back in California working as an extra (excuse me, background artist.)

I knew I couldn't get to the studio from Burbank in twenty minutes...but I was never one to turn down a job. "Sure I can be… Read full post »

"....and the funniest part was...." Stan said as he pointed his finger for emphasis.

The ringing of the phone interrupted the funniest part.

Stan continued his story as I answered.

It was a conference call. Laura, my friend Elaine's Aunt Betty and me.

"Steven we have some bad news."

I knew… Read full post »

"Hey Kid!. Kid......psssst...." the man hissed. "Kid..." He was standing in an alley on 35th Street.  I half expected him to open his jacket and say "You wanna buy a watch?"

"You don't recognize me, do you?"

I stared at the portly man with the bushy eyebrows."Sorry Sir, I can't say I… Read full post »

"Get your fat ass off that mat and stand up!" Mr. Anderson yelled at me. "I want to see you climb that rope and touch the ceiling."

I wanted to climb that rope and touch the ceiling too.

But neither of us was going to get his wish that day. I was… Read full post »

Hello My Friends

This is the week I will be moving and getting the store ready to re-open so I will not be on OS for a while.

I wish you all a happy peaceful week and will be back to OS as soon as I can.

You all mean the world… Read full post »

"Hey you brats," Mrs. Blackmore yelled at us. "Get the hell out of here. Go play somewhere else."  She leaned so far out the window, we could see the top of her ratty housedress blowing in the wind. Her disheveled blond hair stuck out at all angles. "Get outta here now," she screa… Read full post »

A LOVE SONG:

STEVIE  EXPLAINS IT ALL TO YOU 

 A PLAY IN ONE  ACT

The Setting:  Wonderland, a childrens' restaurant with games and rides located in Yonkers, NY

Time period: The Present

The Characters:

Stevie Katz: Age 61

Natalie Katz: deceased

Selma Cohen: deceased

Janet… Read full post »

HEY KIDS!

WHAT TIME IS IT?

IT'S COWBOY DICK TIME!!!!!!!!

 The loud music began. Offstage, Rodeo Rick jumped up and down stirring us into  an applauding frenzy. And Cowboy Dick ran out from behind the stage waving both arms."Hiya boys and girls!"

But today I wasn't at home in… Read full post »

"Give me sixty-five cents more," my boyfriend Bradley said to me, as we rode downtown in a cab.

"Why?"I asked?" I really didn't know.

"Give me sixty-five cents" he insisted. "Hurry. The driver is stopping."

 As the taxi slowed down to let me me out, I divided the meter total… Read full post »

Play that again," my mother yelled into the bedroom. "That wasn't any good. In fact, play it five more times." There was a pause. "Play it until you get it  right."

She was referring to my accordion.

She was referring to my practicing, which admittiedly  wasn't high on my priorities.

"We… Read full post »

"Am I being foolish or passing up a golden opportunity? Douglas asked me over the phone that night. "I mean, I love teaching  school, but it is never  going to make me rich." He hesitated. "Selling diamonds is going to make me real money!"

"I don't know what to tell you,"… Read full post »

"Ah, This one looks like a beauty," my father said, "Plenty of traffic walking by. That means lots of customers." he exclaimed. "But there is competetion on the next block. Not good."

This was before the era of walking into Walmart, and putting  two shoes on your feet,… Read full post »