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Re: 11/2/10 Newsweek interview How do gays play into your argument that men are turning into chicks? The argument I’ve had with a lot of gays is that they essentially present themselves as women. So, you tell your straight assistant, “Hey, go out to my car, get this sack of concrete out…

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There’s nothing I hate more (lie) than having to endure recaps of other people’s dreams.  Of course I don’t mean “dream” in the MLK, Jr. sense, please feel free to share your aspirations of racial harmony, but unless there’s incest involved, I’m not interest…

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Bio: I am a gay male cocksucking blogger, providing inspiration and support for others who enjoy male-to-male oral sex too.

Names names names: Nike, Jansport, Ugg, Victoria’s Secret.  The ladies of Iowa City are reclaiming pink in new, bold ways.  Don’t dare them to pair fuchsia with cotton candy–they’ll do it.  They’ll even throw in a bold teal or a muted camo as a little “fuck you.…

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Iowa City is louder than Los Angeles.  Train horns and ambulance sirens are never-fucking-ending.  And then I have the subtler yet equally bothersome tit tit tit tit of a typewriter wafting up from the apartment below.  In 2010, typewriters should only be used for ransom notes and/or love letters:…

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I’m back and I apologize for being lame and leaving this site to fester.  I’m no better than my deadbeat biological father, Robert Lane Siegel of Atlanta, Georgia. I’m in school for nonfiction writing (yeah, I don’t know what it is, either) so I left Los Angeles for a place w…

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Overheard at the local CVS pharmacy: “A girl’s NuvaRing overheated ’cause it was left in the car.”

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Excuse the absence but I have just endured a relocation from Los Angeles to Iowa City, Iowa which is one of those places where even though it’s called Iowa City, you still have to specify that it’s in the state of Iowa and not like one of those mind-fuck Kansas City…

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With all the rampant disdain for insurance companies, especially Blue Cross, I want to take a moment out and acknowledge the company with the balls to raise premiums 40% at one time. Blue Cross Blue Shield telephone hold message: Hey guys,  a weekend at the lake sounds fun.  But be aware…

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To Whom It May Concern: When you “xxxxxx” at the end of every single email, I begin to doubt your sincerity. Warmly, Matt

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I only participate in gay pride festivities in cities where gay visibility is needed.  I look forward to the future fag functions in my new home of Iowa City, Iowa, where hate groups à la Westboro Baptist Church still line the parade route using their inbred children as pawns.  LA, New…

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Happy Codependence Day, Mom!

Bold statement + I’m just sayin’ ruins everything. As does It is what it is. I’d prefer Bold statement + faggot to the aforementioned.

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A special request for when I leave this earth: please don’t memorialize me via custom car decal on the rear windshield of your car. Today on Sunset and Vine, the Kia in front of me memorialized Tay-Tay (1981-2009) not with a decal, but scratched into the paint.  There’s something more cu…

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Thumbing through my LA Gay and Lezzie Film festival guide, I was forlorn to see a too-attractive wasp sitting at a typewriter wearing a white tee and Buddy Holly glasses with the word “HOWL” next to it and, moreover, the name “James Franco” under that.  I say Goddamn!  Put a…

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Great Aunt: She um…what do they call it…de-balled him? Me: Emasculated him? Great Aunt: Yes, that’s it. Me: Word.

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Patrick Wolf – Army Dreamers (Kate Bush cover) by nmemagazine

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I hate Sex and the City I hate the entire SATC franchise I hate the acronym SATC I hate the slutty one who was in Mannequin I hate Carrie’s voice-overs I hate New York City I hate rich white bitches I hate alleged fashionistas Not all of us queens like this…

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“For the most part entertainment irritates me because I don’t find it very entertaining: I find it annoying and stupid, boring and dull.”…

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www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLAXaZaSuYs

To be the only white female cast member on In Living Color. You have to be in the back of the cast photo but you’re still the only funny cracker bitch.

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Actress, Mother, Designer of high-end wig line: What’s left to do?  Write a shitty book. From Amazon.com: Whether refusing to change her name to Debbie–because producers considered “Raquel” too ethnic–or to lie about her age, even to the detriment of her career, she has…

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The Menendez Brothers: both of them.