I wish I knew what 12 year old me would think about who I am today. Maybe she would be impressed that I am graduating from college in five and a half months, maybe she would be disappointed with how much chubbier I am than I was. I'm sure she would find it absurd that I had yet to have a legitamate relationship in the ten years that separate us. She would laugh about the air-drumming I just did to a Kings of Leon song and would be utterly confused that I like Taylor Swift. January 1, 2000 me would love my lip piercing and my big chunky black glasses. She would be flabbergasted that I am only a half inch taller, but would be stoked about my ridiculously large boobs.
So what does 2010 Ashley think of herself? Honestly, she thinks she is pretty kick-ass. I'm taking a year off after graduation to sort out just what exactly I want to do. I have a sweet lip piercing. I like to think I'm pretty. There's a nice boy that confirms this periodically in a text message. I am not sure that it will ever go anywhere, I've been waiting on him almost four years now.
Sure, my life hasn't turned out quite the way I expected. But does anyone's? I don't think so. I thought I would be tall and thin and have tons of boyfriends like my cousins did. None of those things came true. These facts are disappointing. But I'll survive. I'm not dying to get married right now or anything, I'd just like someone to hang out with and kiss me on a regular basis. I thought I would have tons of friends, have my whole life figured out. I have a few really good friends, and I think that is what counts. I would rather have a few good friends than a lot of bad friends. I suppose that is cliche and cheesy, but I don't care. I am a cheesy sort of girl.
I have no idea where I'll be in 2020. I will be 32, I know that much. I will have a decade-old BA in History. I like to think that I will be married to a lovely man and have a Saint Bernarnd named Chewbacca, and maybe a small child or two. But who knows? Maybe I'll be living in Paris working at the Louvre (after learning French, of course...all I can say is "chicken," "cheese," "with," and "my name is Ashley.") Maybe I will move to New York and work at the Museum of Natural History and dust the t-rex. Maybe I will move back to my hometown and teach. I have no idea what the next ten years have in store for me, and thats okay. I like a bit of mystery.
Goodbye 2009, and the whole first decade of the 21st century - we had a good run. I learned a lot, but it is now time for us to go our separate ways: you to the pages of history books , and me, to wherever the future takes me. Hello, 2010. Nice to meet you - Je m'appelle Ashley.