Reflections of a shallow pond
- Location
- Seattle, Washington,
- Birthday
- August 28
- Bio
- I'm a middle-aged dad, clinging to my daughters' waning youth and my sanity.
MY RECENT POSTS
- A Series of Fortunate Events.
June 17, 2013 03:28PM - Stones the Size of Drones.
June 10, 2013 05:46PM - Free?
June 03, 2013 04:50PM - These People Need to Be
Stopped.
May 27, 2013 04:59PM - Give Us a Chance. We're Just
Like You.
May 23, 2013 02:31PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “Monkey, I can't say I
disagree with your points.
Freaking
Safeway knows me
better…”
June 12, 2013 01:37AM - “Phyllis,
You're
right. I think the coaching
profession, like
teaching
attracts a
s…”
May 28, 2013 11:57AM - “I'm really loving each
and every comment. Thanks
for
fantastic anecdotes and
enco…”
May 18, 2013 06:19PM - “Gosling makes my wife's
heart stop.
Though she
knows he's been tweaked in
Photosho…”
May 13, 2013 12:26PM - “Really nice work in
wrapping up the complexity
of
motherhood.”
May 13, 2013 12:22PM
Reflections of a shallow pond's Links
A Series of Fortunate Events.
Stones the Size of Drones.
Free?
These People Need to Be Stopped.
Whether you're a coach whose biggest challenge is preventing one four-year-old from sustaining irreparable damage to his still-hardening cranial soft spot, resulting from poking his little conk into the arc of another four-year-old's roundhouse t-ball swing,/… Read full post »
Give Us a Chance. We're Just Like You.
Crap. Does This Mean I'm Officially an Old Man?
The Real Mother's Day.
Martin Luther King and Abe Lincoln are each honored on Mondays, yet King was born on a Tuesday, while Lincoln emancipated his spindly self from the womb on a Su/… Read full post »
Thanks for Watching Vietnam, the Sequel.
Your Guide to Finding the Perfect Toilet.
My wife and have been married twenty-four years.
That's kind of a long time, you know? When I really pondered this
the other day, I realized the last time I kissed any female other
than her or another family member, East German soldiers were still
shooting at people trying to escape over… Read full post »
Selling Myself to Myself.
Just curious—do you have a mantra? A credo? Perhaps some
sort of slogan, tenet or delusional proscription to a paranoid
manifesto?
You don't? Well this is awkward.
Ben Franklin had a million of them. Here's a little sampling:
"Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead."
"A… Read full post »
How to Overcome Writer's Block by Not Writing.
Lo and begorrah. I haven't posted to this consarn log in nary a
fortnight!
Sorry, sometimes I enjoy talking like Pa Ingalls—the real
one, not the dashing yet sappy actor who left us far too soon.
It's been ten days. Jeez.
Don’t think it hasn't been bothering me, though. For the
past… Read full post »
She's Thirteen Now.
Then again, my wife says she's just like me, so does that make me a deviant curio as well?
Um, apparently yes, it does.
The thing is, being compared to a thirteen-year-old girl is a little strange when you happen to reside in the meat suit of a fifty-year-old/… Read full post »
Fly on the Wall: Inside a Presidential Conversation.
At last, a legacy congeals into actual brick and mortar.
Dang, it's about time; the world has teetered on pins and needles
long enough.
Located upon a twenty-five acre spread on the campus of Dallas'
Southern Methodist University, the George W. Bush Presidential
Library and Museum is slated to… Read full post »
An Unsung Bloodsport.
I walked toward the front door Thursday morning, bearing the
fresh burden of the twenty-six ton man bag I'd just hurled across
my shoulder. "See you tonight," I said.
"You bet you will." She stood in her bedroom doorway, looking every
bit her just-woke-up teenagerness—pajama pants, one… Read full post »
Life Happened Yesterday.
How does that time-worn old bromide go? Something like, "Life is
what happens when you're busy making other plans."
True that.
As much as we try to segment and sort or lives, as resolved as we
are to organize and prioritize the scripts, every once in a while,
something… Read full post »
Living With OCD: Not Too Shabby.
Look, I'm not a doctor—don't play one on TV, radio or even the occasional podcast.
The nearest I've come to adhering any semblance of the Hippocratic Oath is doing no harm to the avocados I palpate on a weekly basis at Safeway.
But the deal is, those/… Read full post »
Scientific Breakthrough Connects Bad Hair to Obesity.
Over the past fifty years, pretty much since I popped the tag on my
first Hostess pastry, I've been clutching a cold steel bar as it
digs into my upper thigh meat. And once the carny released the
lever, that thing's been locked on with no hope of escaping.
I've been an… Read full post »
Of All the Days to Forget to Wear a Diaper.
I suppose it could be referred to as an "out-of-body-experience," an occasion where your eyes and brain have floated to the ceiling and gazed with wonder upon your body's current station in time and space.
Okay, that sounds a little too marijuanically inspired. What I'm ask/… Read full post »
All You Can Eat at the Home Show.
If someone had slammed the twelve-year-old me against a locker, balled my pointy collar into his fist and demanded "Hey, man ('Dude' wasn't really around yet. We said it sometimes but never when addressing someone like 'Dude, I know, right?'), name a few things that are fun… Read full post »
Why I Heart Thrift Shopping.
"I’m gonna pop some tags,
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket,
I’m, I’m, I’m hunting,
Looking for a come up,
This is f#@*ing awesome."
That's the hook from the number one song in the land this week, as
sung(?) by Seattle's own Macklemore.
Why/… Read full post »
Everybody Does It, So Why Get Rid of It?
How can they do this?
How the hell can these folks eliminate one of the few activities in
which every human being and many in our animal kingdom joyfully
partake?
I'm not kidding here; if somehow I were able to list each person I
either currently know or… Read full post »
Waiting for Weight Watchers to Work Wonders.
Anyway, after 18,417 days spent cruising down life's interstate, I can glance in the rear view mirror and see quite a few stretches where I wasn't exactly wearing a seat/… Read full post »
Some Call It Grumpy. I Call It Righteous.
5:30 AM.
I awakened feeling slightly indignant about the premature jolt into
consciousness, yet somewhere deep within my aging sack of meat,
grateful for another day spent above earth's mossy peat pile.
And while a lot of us roll out of the sack with our senses muted
and… Read full post »
I Am So Sorry, You Guys.
But here's the thing, and I do feel badly. Throughout this tumultuous/… Read full post »
Let's Re-Elect Barack Obama.
Finally, it's almost time. Good God, are you ready for this
thing to be over?
I know I am, but it's my own fault. I mainline so much of this
political stuff, I'm having trouble finding a vein these days.
Ever since Chief Justice John Roberts' stammering oath billowed
wisps… Read full post »
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