'The gift of life.'

1 March 2012

I'm fighting something here and

I don't have a choice 

It's a strange place to find myself in

for someone who's always had a problem fighting

for herself

defending others

fighting the good fight

fighting wrongs

fighting for justice

now fighting for my… Read full post »

Portland, New York
compass points of
longing and latitude
parsing my world
one a vacation
one a vocation

If I ever get rich again
which is all relative anyway
I’ll never spend a penny
I’ll save it all
like Silas
like Midas
grubby, greedy, Gollum-like

Or maybe I’ll go to Portland
and rent a bike… Read full post »

“Don’t I know you from somewhere?”

The question sticks in my mouth
like sultry dough that
refuses to be licked from my lips.

Life is a game of chances
played in (blind T)error
a dice cast in dismay-motion.

Now and then,
a recognition comes un-bidden
shivers of might-have-been,
an instinctual… Read full post »

“Sensible as pyjamas”.

It’s Sunday morning and I’m listening to the radio.  The phrase captivates me; I cannot leave it be.   It is suspended above the crater that was my imagination.  

My husband is gone out.  He’s on a ‘ride-out&rsquo… Read full post »

Sexed-up 'n' clued-in

the ol' bait 'n' switch

the ol' grab 'n' pinch

Reciprocal,

radical,

 epidermal wrapping

late Sunday solstice morning 

sweet springtime air

sealed within its healing

wetness

binding 

bonded

bound

 A debt unto death.

&n… Read full post »

This post has arisen from a belated response to an OS friend who reached out to ask about me.   It was just a short message, not insistent but provocative.   It reminded me that I had once felt I belonged here, that I had made friends here and that I would… Read full post »

Two hours ago she knocked at my door.

Four hours ago she found her daughter dead in bed. 

My husband falls in from the door, 

"It's Kate.  She says Ciara's dead."

My arm continues ironing; 

obviously he is wrong.

I correct him:

"Her mother, you… Read full post »

Stalking is a crime.   It is a crime against the person and it is not to be tolerated.    It is not trivial; it is not funny.   It is not confined to celebrities; ordinary people get stalked every day.   It inflicts pain: psychological, financial, relational an… Read full post »

Somehow I have become

a new and awesome one 

who waits,

weights,

waits

Measuring

pound and ounce;

pain and gain

My physical essence

a medium of exchange,

of value;

this for that;

now for then

Over-powering,

be-labouring,… Read full post »

Dublin, Day One:
For three years we've toyed with the idea of touring the coast of Scotland on the motorbike and at last we've booked the hotels and there's petrol in the tank and we're going to do it.   We were packing until two o'clock in the morning and rose at… Read full post »

Dukan day 30:  10lbs lost.  Ten pounds in four weeks.

Numbers.  Each one representing a limit, a finite coordinate.  'The limit of n as n approaches infinity'.  Once again, limits.   

Now people notice my weight loss, my body.  My reaction to their remarks surpri… Read full post »

Good luck tomorrow, Dorinda!   See you back here soon, let's get a picture of you beside Phil's statue on Grafton Street!

xxx

Fighting my Way Back -Phil Lynott:

I'm tough, rough, ready and able

To pick myself up form under this table

I got no… Read full post »

Jon Venables and Robert Thompson, when both ten years old, were arrested for the murder of three year old Jamie Bulger in 1993.   Jamie was abducted from a Merseyside shopping centre, taken by the hand and led away while his mother was choosing meat cuts at a butcher's stall.  … Read full post »

Anger is a necessary instinct.  Usually, we forget that and speak of it only as an inconvenience, a problem, a moral failing, a vice.  In actual fact, it is only an emotion.   How we use it, just like any other emotion, determines its beng a vice or a virtue.   For insta… Read full post »

Dukan Day 16, 8.2 lbs lost.   Eight pounds in sixteen days! My chiropractor is impressed.   She can see the difference in the rolls on my waist; I can see the difference in the fullness of my toes, now visible past what used to be stomach.

Dukan Day 20: 8.8lbs lost… Read full post »

Dukan Day 10: 6 lbs lost.

I’m on the day on/day off phase, the ‘cruise’ phase.   According to the Dukan website, this is marked by ‘perseverance’.   According to my body, it’s been marked by flashes of temptation:

a perfectly round electric blue… Read full post »

Dukan Day five: 6 lbs lost.

Dukan Day Six: 1.5 lbs gained.

Dukan Day Seven: no change.

Read full post »

Dukan Day three: 4.5 lbs lost.

The level of weight loss is slowing; only a half-pound yesterday.  

The book warns that energy levels may drop for some people trying the diet.  I didn't get tired but I did get bored yesterday.   I didn't eat as much as the previous… Read full post »

Dukan, Day 3: 4lbs lost.

 
Two days, four pounds.   This feels strange: to be counting pounds, to be announcing myself in terms of weight, of flesh, lost.   Yesterday I stopped into the video shop and bought Al Pacino’s ‘Merchant of Venice’ - no, Shakespeare… Read full post »

Dukan, Day 2: 2.5lbs lost.  

So, today, I'm having oat bran and fat-free yogurt for breakfast.  Last night I read through the book and checked out the recipes as well as the total list of permitted foods.  Yes, I admit, I started this diet without reading the book.   And… Read full post »

Today is the first day of my Dukan Diet attempt.   I seriously need to lose weight but it's something I've been working hard to ignore for a long time now.  So, apart from adhering to Dr. Dukan's principles, I am trying to analyse my attitude to weight, dieting, and womanliness.… Read full post »

My son came home yesterday grinning guilelessly as he described his friend's girlfriend.   Apparently this paragon Amazon has passed the 'meet my gang' test.   Tagging behind me as I cleared the laundry from the radiators into his innocent arms, he detailed her extraordinary attributes one… Read full post »

Easter had always been yellow for me: yellow bunnies, yellow Cadbury tinfoil wrapping on chocolate egs, yellow filling on Creme Eggs, yellow stripes on Easter Rising lilies and on proudly raised flags above our public buildings on Easter Sunday...  

When my father died, Easter became blac… Read full post »