Studman's Soapbox

Surfing the vacuous void of disabled in the media


Stow, Ohio, USA
December 14
Resident Smart Ass
Self employed
WELCOME TO A CRIPPLE'S WORLD From here on out, this blog will carry regular contributions by the author (me), concerning how and where the disabled are inaccurately portrayed, or more often than not, simply ignored by the media. Please feel free to read my previous posts, as this is something of a "stream of consciousness" blog, and one entry very well may, and often does depend on what has already been said. Please be aware, I am un-PC, a bit of a smart ass, and as Rodney Dangerfield said in "Back to School" "I don't take shit from nobody" :-D If the things said here offend you, then so be it. I am a strong minded, strong willed man with an opinion. However, my opinion can and does change over time, as I mature and learn more about the world. So, if you are in the mood to argue, or see something you disagree with, bring it on. Just be forewarned that what I consider "offensive" is not what the rest of the world may find offensive, and vice versa. Okay? Okay. photo is "extreme sitter" Aaron Fotheringham, who can be seen on Youtube or his website,, where he performs many of his wheelchair skate ramp tricks

MAY 12, 2010 1:33PM

"we're done here"

Rate: 28 Flag


                            "We're done here"-Picture by Google Images


"we're done here"

Three simple words

With a lot of power.

Usually used in the process of ending debate, discussion, disagreement. These words have the ability to often stop people, and even thought in its tracks.

But, are anyone ever really "done here"?

I don't believe so.

At least, not until we die.

Yes, at death, we are all "done here"

But, I for one, will never understand the mindset of those who do not wish to continue to argue, to debate, to expand our minds, and look at other options, other alternatives, and, quite simply, look at the world in a different perspective or different light.

I wonder, is "we're done here" really an attempt by those to excuse their own ignorance of a topic or an idea? Is it just a scapegoat for people who are afraid of looking at a different perspective, a different way of looking at things?

 I don't know.

But, what I do know is that, until the day I die, I will never be "done here"

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Debate rarely changes minds. Programming and repetition do far more for that.

Early 'Debates' in college and later as young adults form the poltical views everyone stays with pretty much their whole lives until they become old and jaded, at which point they become republicans.

As far as 'we're done here' it's all about reaching that magical point when understanding simply cannot be reached.

Like, for instance, if I were to say I advocated the idea of taking freshly aborted fetuses and using them as shotgun targets in skeet matches.

There would be a point where you would say "we're done here." I can nearly gaurentee it.
Me neither brother. Well said.
I don't know that we are ever done, or ever stop caring about it, but I hope there is a point when we are ok with letting go.

I guess I'm just an incurable optimist and believe that an understanding can be reached when people make a logical point/counter-point discussion.

The "we're done here" crowd seems to be the people who, for whatever reason, can only attack a point, without making a counter point to their own counter position.


it seems to me that "we're done here" is the tool of people who only intend to attack, without any attempt at making a logical rational counterpoint. And, I don't even really care that much about the "logical, rational" part anymore...if you're going to disagree with me, tell me what led to your alternative conclusion

Why should you want to let go of something, when someone else is blatantly telling you that it's wrong to hold onto that thing (or belief) in the first place? If someone else tells me I'm wrong for what I think and believe, they better be able to explain WHY they feel that my thing or belief is wrong to hold onto
Oh, P! STFU! Heheheee! Can you imagine if someone said that to Stephen Hawking? Of course, people have...and hehehee....he just sorta says, yeah...go take a long walk into an infinite universe! xoxoxo
well said. reasonable discussion and debate should never really end. and looking at all sides of an argument is never a bad thing, as far as i'm concerned. but humans being flawed, we inevitably fall to the "we're done here" when we don't want to admit that discussion has gone awry or refuse to see the other side.

Yeah, Steve really would just run their asses over...with his chair AND his intellect...I'd hate to be the one who said "we're done here" to him
Ah, you're an optimist. That explains a lot. Being a pessopissimust, meaning I'm pessimistic to the point of pissing on other people's optimisim, I simply MUST inform you that you are on the wrong path here, Stud.

When I say, "no friggin way will people ever change or evolve because we bring them the truth" I mean it. The only way to do that is with electroshock, a series of videos, some white noise and a dark room.

THEN you'll see some opinions shift!

See that glass....half empty!
We're done here is usualy an attempt to control a converstaion by a show of contempt. Seems like the refuge of a coward to me.

Too many people are too danged stubborn to admit that there are no such things as absolutes, and that everything in the universe, including perspective, is fluid and ever changing
While it's a rude way of ending things. It is a way to end things. In an arguement, both people can be right, in thier opinion. Thier facts will mean more to them than the others facts, so after a while someone figures it out and knows it won't end on it's own, so they shut it down.

Take Al Gores "The debate is over." He's been proven wrong so many times after he ended the debate it's comical.

And you're just the guy to turn "electroshock, a series of videos, some white noise and a dark room." into a viable mind changing machine!

See, optimism! hehehe

I had that thought myself, but I refrained from saying it cause I've pissed enough people off already today (see Robin's post yesterday...which inspired this one LOL)


The problem for me comes when someone says "We're done here", not because they don't see an inevitable conclusion to the debate, but simply because they are tired of attacking someone else's opinion or perspective, without proposing a counter perspective.

I simply believe that, if someone is going to claim there is more than one side to a story, or more than one perspective, they have to show evidence of that counter point, not just attack the methods used to acheive the initial point
Uh...if I said that to Steph, I would be done brain would be exploded forever. xox

In my case, since I'm wheelchair bound too, it would be a case of "Deadliest Warrior" to see who won out...LMAO

Oh, who are we kidding? The man would wipe his ass with me LOL
OOoohhh, Ok!
You're talking about that terrible feeling in a heated argument when you realize that you're wrong. And the people not mature enough to admit it.

Good luck with that.

Good luck with that.

I guess I just don't see anything wrong with admitting when I'm wrong...and, hell, I often am wrong...people learn from mistakes and wrong turns and generally not knowing something they thought they's all part of the learning process, and when someone can't admit they're wrong, it makes it that much harder to learn and grow

Indeed, Andy usually does hit the nail on the head most times
done here? sheesh ...most days i feel like i've barely begun.

You and me both!!
I've actually never heard anyone say those words but that would rile me too, unless the discussion was an impossibly political one, but then I rarely would get into such a debate because from vast experience, no matter how well worded, few change minds re: politics. Even so, "We're done here" sounds so rude. R

It IS rude, and as I said to Anthony above, rather bordering on cowardice to boot. When someone makes an assertion, then is asked for evidence to support that assertion, and the evidence does not live up to the inquisitor's standard, it seems that all they can do is end the conversation, and do so rudely

Complete, indeed....there just is no excuse for it, especially in the circumstances I provide in the other comments
I'm not sure we are even "done here" when we die. I'm waiting to see.

Ah, well, that's a whole other kettle of fish Im not ready to cook up and serve yet.
Sometimes I need those words to preserve my sanity, like debating neo-cons, but I hear what you are saying and agree - ultimately pushing on and knowing when to do so is a great reward.

And, I don't even think we're done when we die. In fact, I know we're not.

I guess it's a matter of whether the phrase is meant to say "we are at an impasse and simply disagree", or is it a matter of the speaker saying "we are at an impasse because I don't know how to respond"

If the person simply disagrees, fine, that's welcome. But, when they disagree they should be required to elaboration on their point of disagreement

THEN you can say "okay, we'll agree to disagree"

But someone can't appropriately disagree if they don't know what they are disagreeing with

I suppose it depends on the the impasse really a legitimate difference in perspective or is someone simply trying to not defend their own position?

If the intent is simply to deflect a defense or explanation of a counter position, or a refusal to accept someone else's counter position, then it just seems....well, perplexing at best
We’re done here can have several different meanings, depending, of course, on context:

Meaning 1: We’re done here (I have pretended to listen to your point of view long enough and I never intended to be persuaded by you.)

Meaning 2: We’re done here (you have made your point, I have counter-pointed, you countered again, etc. until I am all out of counterpoints, but I’m still not convinced.)

Meaning 3: We’re done here (you have pushed me to the end of my rope. If we argue another minute I might just beat the crap out of your stubborn ass.)

Meaning 4: We’re done here ( I suddenly see your point but I’m too much of a right-fighter to tell you that so I’m ending the conversation before you find out for yourself.)

Meaning 5: We’re done here (you have made me feel like an idiot and I don’t play that.)


In my humble opinion, meaning 2 should be the only realistically viable use of that phrase.

All others point to a weakness in the "challenger" or the "challenge" itself, in which case, why would someone make a challenge with a weak or no basis?

(that's a rhetorical question, of course)
Ok this thing has been up this long and no one has gotten to the point where they have actually said "We're done here?" WTF people! Where is your sense of humor.

I'm just going to have to try harder.

Seriously, man, I think you and I are just on a completely different plane of existance, at least where our sense of humor is concerned, than a lot of people around here.
I've tried three times to comment here. We are never done unless we just quit.

@Andy, I may be old and jaded but I will never be a republican.

The problem is that too many people give up and just quit when there is still more fight to be fought

Now, if there's no fight left in a person, that's a different story, of course, but many times people give up simply because things are too hard

Everything worthwhile in life is hard, and worth fighting for if you still think you can win
I'm not in the mood right now cause I'm not feeling very bright or very smart, so don't be debating with me..after all not to bright and not to smarts have no opinions do they...anyway..I did have one of those done moments today after showering Mom. Water went off, got her dried off and dressed leaving with a hearty, "We're done here." ~R

(((HUGS))) well, thats a totally different kind of "done", that's "I can't", not "I don't want to"

The type of "I'm done here" is the "I'm taking my ball and going home, cause you hurt my feelings" mentality
It is my experience that these words are spoken by people who don't want to be confused by factual information.

That very well could certainly seemed to be in the case I was involved in this morning and yesterday
No Stud. I could ( and I did) but I really didn't want to... I didn't wanna play..I did take the towel and I went home...well I was home..but I left the vacinity. And she did beg me to stay and dicusss her bowels movesments so I guess that was sort of a debate. I'm don't go much for movements, that tea party shit annoys the hell out of me, so I figured're talking shit, I don't wanna discuss it so, I'm done here. What's not to get? Do we have to debate this? luv ya too :-)
@bob - perhaps you just aren't old enough? It's kind of like the 11th hour christian thing...right at the end you might find yourself saying in a gasping whisper "Corporations are people too..."

Stud - We're brothers from a different mother.

LOL I just replied to your PM...that's PM not BM...Private Message...not....Uh, never mind...I've said WAY too much already :-)


Uh, didnt SCOTUS already declare that corporations WERE people?

Uh, anyway...yeah, something like that
Simple words to hide behind, thoughts in this continuum are forever...
I think the phrase is dismissive really, almost cold. The only situations I've been in, the person who said it came off as an asshole.

You know it's funny you should mention that. You must have been reading my posts lately. My friends always say I like to kick dead horses. They always say "We are done here!", but I don't stop. LOL
I doubt that I'll be "done here" even after I die. I have (sadly) mourned the deaths of several close friends and relatives during the last few years. They are not "here" in the same sense that they were when they could still share a bottle of wine or box of chocolates with me, but I can certainly feel their continued presence and would not say that any of them are completely "done here."

Agreed, and the only reason to hide is fear


Well, assholes ARE notorious for spewing shit LOL


I never stop! I WANT to annoy people, cause eventually they'll HAVE to address the point I'm trying to make.


Ah forgive me, it was a bit of atheistic hyperbole to make a point of finality, as if I'm saying "I'm done here"
I see your point, Ryan. I think sometimes it is useful to just move on and say we are done here. Continuing to debate a situation to death can end up exhausting and manipulative at times, don't you think? I would rather just accept differences and look for commonalities. There are a few issues I feel I need to express a dissenting view on and when I do, I am willing to explain my point of view at length in some cases and even argue to a certain degree. Where it gets sticky and uncomfortable is when someone tries to change my view or insist that he or she is correct and I am wrong. That's when I say.. "We're done here." At least with that particular conversation. I just want to be free to be me. I don't want to have to defend who I am all the time.


It's a matter of context...."we're done here" is often used as a euphimism for "I'm right, you're wrong, so go jump in a lake (or worse"'s one thing to disagree, if the disagreement is based on substance, but if there is no substance to the position, than it is not disagreement, it is attack.
Very well put. Neither will I. rated.