Breaking the Silence
- Bay Area, California,
- June 12
- I'm left-handed, six feet tall, and I like broccoli but not cauliflower. I'm Michigander by birth, Californian by choice. Oh, yeah, and I'm infertile. There. I said it. Now you'll understand how living in an era of designer babies and helicopter parents served up loads of material for my book, Silent Sorority (http://www.silentsorority.com). When I'm not working with startups in Silicon Valley, I'm a forty-something writer exploring ideas and society's norms. At the keyboard is where I am most relaxed. So join me here as I try to be less type A and maybe figure a few things out....
MY RECENT POSTS
- Guiliana & Bill: No More
Half-Truths About Infertility
December 03, 2012 11:19AM
- Has the Culture of Motherhood
Become a Cult?
October 24, 2012 12:47PM
- Ann Romney: Only Moms Matter
August 29, 2012 11:07AM
- Olympic Narrative Bias, Why
August 08, 2012 11:53AM
- Never Knocked Up, Never
June 08, 2012 11:27AM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “I completely empathize
with your view and appreciate
honesty. Too many
April 04, 2012 11:07AM
- “Thanks for rounding out
the story of TBI. It's
November 16, 2011 11:15AM
- “@Gerri: For some reason,
your comment prompted the
September 21, 2011 01:35PM
- “@Sandra @Reality Chick:
Thanks for bringing some new
September 20, 2011 11:43AM
- “@Jane @DylanandPaul:
Thanks for dropping by and
September 19, 2011 03:52PM
Pamela Tsigdinos's Links
- MY LINKS
Misinformation is worse than no information.
It's easy to reach this conclusion when you see how half-truths can radically, adversely influence lives. While infertility has been documented as early as the biblical era it's only recently, as science has advanced, that we've heard it discussed in more… Read full post »
Who doesn't relish great role models? Those confident,
make-it-happen types who can inspire us to dream BIG.
Props to spunky Marlo Thomas for her work on Free to Be… You and Me (40 years old next month) and to plucky Mary Tyler Moore and her sidekick Rhoda Morgenstern.… Read full post »
TO: Ann Romney
RE: Enough Already With the Mom Pandering!
Like many others I am a registered voter and a citizen who wants greatness not only to flourish in the United States of America, but in countries all over the world. I am also a political junkie&n…
It's hard not to be caught up in the excitement of the Olympics. Beyond the awe-inspiring athleticism, stories abound. They resonate in large part because we understand the context. The narratives fulfill a hunger of sorts — whether for inspiration, a sense of accomplishment or a common… Read full post »
Day in and day out women without children are bombarded by messages about the superior life experience that accompanies motherhood. Some of us have never been knocked up, but that doesn't mean we've been knocked out.
When was the last time infertile women got some recognition for all their… Read full post »
I hereby declare the "All Things Mommy Era" to be post-peak.
While the diefication of mothers has had an extended run, it's
time, ladies, to make some room on the stage.
Who are the new "It Girls"? That's right: Non-Moms! We've got books, virtual lunches, blogs, video chats. Our… Read full post »
I am not living a fate worse than death, although that's certainly the implication from a recent "Heroes Among Us" People magazine feature called, "One Mom's Mission: Help Others Adopt."
The Mom explains that she was motivated in her cause because she "can't live" with the idea of people living a… Read full post »
"It was like going to a party you're terrified of, and
finding out to your amazement that you're having a good
That's how Betty Ford, who passed away today at 93, described her life in the White House during one of the most turbulent times in U.S.… Read full post »
June 10, 2008 was a day unlike any other. There I was, Pamela Mahoney Tsigdinos, pictured on the home page of The New York Times with a link to a health feature about my husband and me — Exhibit A: one of the many millions of “involuntarily childless” couples… Read full post »
Allen Ginsberg once described "Howl" as “a promotion of frankness, about any subject.” He might have made people uncomfortable with his words, but he also made us think deeply. In Oprah's world, we're supposed to pull up our socks and put a smiley face on any subject that… Read full post »
A new movie may bring to light what some of us of already
know: overzealous parents today have not only changed the
tenor of parenting, but the nature of friendships with those who do
not have children.
"We're going mainstream."
That comment from a friend without kids accompanied a link… Read full post »
In 2006 I read a news brief in the Wall Street Journal about women chronicling their infertility experiences online. I was aghast and intrigued. I tore the item out of the newspaper and washed the newsprint from my hand.
A few months later in February 2007, I sat down in… Read full post »
The political season is (thankfully) at an end. I've gnashed my teeth more than once listening to candidates — from both political parties — proclaim their fitness for office by invoking their mystical "mom" powers. Enough already with the "Mama Grizzlies," "As a Moms" or those… Read full post »
What would Aldous Huxley say? The pioneer behind in vitro fertilization gets the Nobel Prize, new research determines the probability of successful embryos, and children created with donor gametes want to know more about their "genetic parents."
Scientists observing the behavior of one-celled embyro… Read full post »
It may be 2010, but in one very big way we're still locked in the past. It took Gail Collin's book, When Everything Changed, to make me… Read full post »
We'll be singing
When we're winning
We'll be singing ...
It was mid-afternoon in the Sierra Nevada Mountains when the
Three loads of laundry were folded and tucked back into their rightful place. The kitchen floor glistened, still fresh from a serious mopping with Murphy's Oil… Read full post »
Who knew that perimenopause would give me the cleavage of
Kim Kardashian, some days bordering on Heidi Montag?
Listen up here, hormones, I'd like a word with you...
Okay, now that I've got your… Read full post »
Despite being a funny looking, gangly slip of a girl, my dad made me believe I was the most beautiful, bright daughter a father could ever want. He encouraged me to reach high, and celebrated every victory no matter how small. He engaged in the usual dad activities… Read full post »
America's frustration, impatience and angst around the BP's attempt to cap the deep water oil spill felt remarkably familiar, an echo of a more personal demand for science and technology to step it up.
We live in an age of unprecedented knowledge, technological advancement. There should be n… Read full post »
Today's fertile women have yesterday's
infertile women to thank for the development of the mighty
That's right. My people have apparently had quite the societal impact. I learned about the Pill's paradoxical beginning in a recent Time cover story. In researching the Pill's consequences, writer… Read full post »
“Infertility,” my husband once observed, “is one of those topics you want to bury, and then bury the shovel.”
His perspective is hardly unique among those who have had to confront infertility head on. The diagnosis packs a devastating punch and cuts to the very core of what i… Read full post »
In a television show about a modern family practicing polygamy we get ringside seats as the family members navigate the seamier side of politics, gambling and fringe religion, but one thing is clear: fertile women rule.
There are plenty of plot twists and surprises packed into each hour-long episode… Read full post »
"How's the baby....?"
The question hung in the air Friday afternoon. My stomach clenched.
"There was no baby..." I said quietly.
"No baby?? That can't be...the response, it was so good. I didn't see you again..."
Tears stung and burned in my eyes. I shook my head hard, forcing myself to be matter of…
From worries about being the strange old lady moms you see in the park to infertile women in their 30s and 40s getting questioned about when they're going to start their families, misreadings by passersby interpret people's life status… Read full post »
Elizabeth Gilbert I am not.
Envy about her being #1 in Amazon.com's "memoir" category aside, there are other reasons to dwell on her this morning just as the sun is about to rise.
Let's start there. The sun is about to rise and I'm *not* consumed with angst. Breakfast with angst,