When you find what you were never searching for...
- West Coast Body, East Coast Heart, California,
- January 19
- Don't even have to knock...come on in.
- I am now 45 and perfectly OK with that. I've been a mom for over 12 years now. I live a rather simple yet difficult life of trying to make sure my daughters are polite, well-educated and know they are loved beyond question. I do my best to give my family whatever they need. And I'm trying to take care of myself.
I am infinitely trying to make people happy, make people laugh, make people feel good about themselves. I compliment often, but only with sincerity. I spend way too much time thinking about what might be the "right" thing to do in any given situation. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx This is a personal journey for me. I have grown in ways I didn't know were possible.
AND AN UPDATE: Don't forget your worth. This speaks to everyone, not just me. xoxoxo ~~~~ And thx, B. My heart was beginning to thaw but your beautiful friendship has melted it.
FURTHER UPDATE: - B, darling, you have brought me love and peace. You sent the words, "Be gentle with yourself." I am able to do so only because you have been gentle with my heart. I love you, soul mate.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx And now, it's been 18 months... So incredible to recall where I was and where your love has taken me...xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx And now, two years have passed since those first simple PMs...xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxAnd now, three...
MY RECENT POSTS
October 20, 2012 02:44PM
- Ice Cream for Breakfast Day!
May 25, 2012 09:31AM
- WANTED: Nice CEO
February 23, 2012 01:28PM
- Tunnel of Love
February 14, 2012 11:45AM
- Ever wonder what one looks
like...?? The view from my
January 10, 2012 05:00PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “I used to know
guess I could
Google how, but
May 09, 2013 04:58PM
- “I was never raised to
have lasting relationships,
May 09, 2013 04:45PM
- “Funny - I'm most freaked
out about stuff that * isn't
real... How do I get
May 09, 2013 04:37PM
- “Dang it - I was going to
write something in bold type
would look and feel
May 09, 2013 04:21PM
- “HI SEER!!!!!!”
May 07, 2013 09:07AM
Outside Myself's Links
- MY LINKS
Holidays are quite a big deal in our house. I've been Santa, The Easter Bunny, The Valentine, whatever the entity is that leaves candy in the shoes outside around Christmastime (I can never remember who that is but my girls never forget!), and a host of other colorful characters. And, on… Read full post »
I've spent some time thinking about Torman's Open Call and thought I would answer that question when I came up to my one year blogiversary, which I will.
However, it dawns on me that there is a greater question at work in my own heart and that is "Why DON'T I… Read full post »
Did you know that I was the youngest out of six girls?
Yeah, OK, I know you knew that. Just wanted to make sure you knew I wasn't a bad kid. I had reeeeeasons for my actions (or so I tell myself). (Denial is a lovely tool.)
My older sisters had… Read full post »
In response to the Salon Kitchen Challenge, in which we are required to use our real names, I must forego participating officially, but love this recipe SO MUCH I just HAD to share...
CRESPELLE WITH ASPARAGUS AND PORCINI MUSHROOMS
Hello, my dear, dear friends on OS.
I can't start out by saying anything other than a deeply felt thank you.
I have been gone from OS for what seems like months although in reality it's only been 17 days. Wow, how does it feel like it's been a… Read full post »
I will never find the right words to convey what you mean to me...how you have changed my entire life and indeed saved it. My heart was in despair and my life was lived in… Read full post »
Barry and Angela
As I've mentioned recently, I used to sing in a quartet.
Four women. Acapella.
We did not live close to each other geographically, but we were close friends which made the experience a most enriching one.
One gal in her 30's, one in her 40's,
… Read full post »
I have been off of OS for a few days as I have taken my girls to the snow.
I was cruising OS just briefly last night and just as one of my daughters passed by, I read that Safe_Bet had passed away and I gasped. She asked what was wrong… Read full post »
For about four years I sang in a women's quartet and we were very fortunate to perform in various shows, at various venues and in concert with many holidays.
Christmas performances were always magical. The audience seemed to have a special light about them as they smiled at us, singing in… Read full post »
Faith (l) and Grace (r), back when they were 4 & 5
Visiting a local historical home on Grace's birthday
Every "wishberry" - each dandelion -
you grasp excitedly in front of your lips.
Your eyes gleaming.
You close your eyes
You bl… Read full post »
This song is dedicated to anyone who wonders if there is someone reading their posts. Sometimes you may feel you are writing alone, but believe me, there is someone here for you.
We're here for you!
And we're worth writing for!
Each Valentine's Day
I remember you.
Each Valentine's Day
after all these years...
. . . David . . .
I imagine you can't know
the damage you've done...
You changed my life.… Read full post »
The rain does not fall.
It is as if the earth pulls it from the gray.
Calling for it, begging for its nourishment.
It inhales as the rain places itself upon its lines.
The sound, the feel...
It is seductive.
There is life which awakens.
Deeply hidden. … Read full post »
I coach one of my daughters' basketball and volleyball teams at their K-8 parochial school. Every couple of weeks, a few of my players must miss practice after school because they have detention.
As they tell me this, I always just put up my hand and say, "You don't have… Read full post »
Q: What vegetable do plumbers like?
(Wow, that was stupid.)
(* BTW, leeks are different from green onions/scallions. They are about 5x larger and the stalks are very tough.)
I wasn't planning to post today, but as happens to me so very often, I see that others need healing and a positive message, and I want to help however I can.
So to those who are hurting, to those who have struggled with a career, or with parents who are ill,… Read full post »
It seems bendan bendan is a voracious reader.
It seems bendan bendan has taken one of those speed reading classes.
(As an aside, if you'd like to make your friends and family laugh, hold your palm outward as you quickly drive by a palm reader and say out loud,… Read full post »
It's no accident that I chose to write under a pseudonym. I knew, going into it, that there would be things that I wanted to write about that I hoped to heaven no one who knew me could ever find. Ever.
I know most of you know me as a nice… Read full post »
Open Salon ~ July 3, 2009.
A simple message sent with innocence.
A simple reply sent with innocence.
Real Life ~ January 3, 2010.
Two hearts that are no longer lonely.
Two souls that were moving towards each other for 42 years.
I want to reside in… Read full post »
OK, it can't just be me.
Sometimes, I hum your name as I wander through the kitchen.
Sometimes, I repeat your name over and over in my head until I'm annoyed (but in a nice way ;).
Sometimes, I wonder what on earth led you to your name.
Sometimes, I want… Read full post »
OK, here are some songs that make me want to dance!!!!! I know, they are not your favorites...but ONE might be. As I say in the comments, I have very eclectic musical tastes, from Primus to Sinatra, to Contemporary Christian, to kids' music, to instrumentals like the harp...don't try to f… Read full post »
To bring some holiday cheer, I wrote this little song and once again, just recorded it with the built-in mic on my iMac (I'm not even sure where it is, I just sing towards the screen! :)
"This is the UN-scenic route? Wow, you ARE spoiled!"
Everywhere I looked, there were an infinite number of trees, in postcard colors. They don't make trees like this in California...not like this. So sure, we were on a freeway, but I couldn't swallow that this wasn't conside… Read full post »