Oryoki's House

Where's the Mojitos? I have the guac!

Oryoki Bowl

Oryoki Bowl
February 03
Quaker buddhist, kinda quirky, loves cooking and knitting and movies. Dr Who fan, Scandinavian-aquarian and cat lover. Would love to be paid to travel around the world and write about local healing cultures. While eating and drinking and dancing. One day I will have a health cruise in the fjords.


FEBRUARY 22, 2012 5:11PM

My friends think you're hot! DILFs and modern life

Rate: 20 Flag

My sweetie is a handsome man.  I noticed him sitting at a party, by himself, thinking "Wow, he's handsome, he's probably married".  His two kids were there, and I didn't look around for a Mrs.  Instead, I mingled with others, and he walked across the room and sat next to me, and started talking.  Introduced his kids.  Married men don't do that, and he asked for my number.  

I didn't stay with him because he was cute, our relationship didn't work out at first, but his beautiful smile did plenty to cut past the crushingly awkward dating misfires.  We became friends instead, swapping out "trades" for things he could do (computer repair, photography) for things I could do (the best massage in town).  He didn't smile much back then, but when he did, I went weak in the knees.  Lucky him.  It led to home made food, swapping cat sitting while we traveled, and eventually a conversation about sharing a place (both of us needing cheap rent and a roomie we could stand).  Love blossomed, and now it is three happy years later.  I still get weak in the knees when he smiles.  He gets weak in the knees when I smile, and is easily dazzled by my blue eyes.  

What's funny is that whenever he meets a friend or family member (female), they very commonly remark right off the bat "Oh, he's really handsome."  My aunt called him Handsome John for the first year (as we knew another, less handsome John).  Now he does photography and computer repair work for her, she gets to enjoy his company, and he is still a great guy.  When it's your office mates at a Christmas party, there is the initial "Oooh" and then the week after when you hear how NICE he is as well as handsome.  Now, I am a fairly attractive woman, so it's not like he's out of my league.  I also have dated enough pretty boys who were not nice that looks cannot be the only thing.  John is also the least vain person I know, and just smiles when I say this to him (I always tell him when he is complimented, with a sparkle) and then promptly forgets.  

 I am not a mother, but I am of the age when women start trying to regain the attention of the younger mens.  I occasionally have a younger man flatter me, but I am no cougar and I am no MILF and I am no fool.  Demi and Madonna had their work cut out for them, and we know it is not an equal opportunity world when it comes to marriage and constant companionship.  I am a few years younger than John, which is the way he prefers it.  Most days, I can't tell, my world and life experience is vastly broader than his.  Our high school years line up enough that we share the same preferences for alternative music, though he leans more Industrial and I lean more New Wave.  As our relationship is still young, I am also not trying to recapture the young years of passion we used to have.  

With our relationship comes two daughters of his, and I get along with both (as you may have noticed or not in my Almost Stepmother Chronicles).  The older, Alex, is a girl of her times, open and edgy and very fluid with the sex and dating scene.  Still mostly only dates boys, but the stigma of liking girls is no longer in her generation.  She has many male friends, almost all of whom would be happy to have a chance to hook up with her or be her boyfriend.  She is almost never single.  But, she is almost also never in a mutually monogamous, planning for marriage and babies relationship.  Girls aren't always looking for that, and neither are boys.  

Alex visited us last night, with her guy friend, and we had a great dinner.  Her friend has a reputation as a player, and he spent his conversation talking about his preference for the much, much older ladies.  He is no longer allowed to meet his friends' moms, and his mother won't let him meet her friends anymore either.  He is charming and very confident.   What was a bit odd, for me, was the changing awareness and openness with which we talked about it.  Alex spoke of how often her female friends have expressed a major crush on her dad.  Her friend spoke of the time he made a play for her mom, and her mom thought it was funny.  I said I didn't see anything happening between us, but he could still come for dinner sometimes with her if she wanted to bring him (he has a car).  He said we could text, if I want.  I declined.  

My friend has a dad that I find charming and attractive.  He is married to the woman who was his secretary when he was married to my friend's mom.  They have their ups and downs, but when they visit I sometimes end up going out to dinner with them.  I joke with her, you know I have a crush on your dad, if we were both single.... and my friend laughs and says, everyone has a crush on my dad.  It's been going on since high school.

My father was charming and a player, but none of my friends ever so much as suggested he was handsome or having a crush.  I couldn't see it myself, I just had to hear it from the smitten (and older women, the babysitters and divorcees) how handsome my dad was.  I am also glad I never had to go through this.  John laughs it off, and then we have to tell them to can it, because it's just a bit weird and wrong to have to tell your kids' friends that you don't want to date them.  Or just hook up.  For coffee or texing or something.  

I complain to John that his friend's never say "Your girlfriend is hot" to him, but we also know they aren't tacky like that.  One of them hits on me, all the time, as is his reputation, and I see right through it.  He also has a much, much older wife who he complains about.  Funny thing is, though, she has had five husbands and is a bit more of a MILF that way.  He is neither a player nor very charming, and I think he is luckier than he knows.  She is still in love with him.  

I'll just have to hang on to telling John he is my arm candy, if he runs out of things to talk about at boring doctor events.  It keeps me smiling, anyhow, to know I am dating a DILF. 

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Terri has never been jealous of me that I know of, of course, I have no roving eye. I did as a young man, I guess this is why this is my second marriage.
All this is pretty interesting.
Older gals? They are the "New" hot commodity, believe me.
I shall put it in vile smutty terms: "they know their stuff".
sexually, intellectually, morally...
this is not momma chasing.
this is the sincere need
for several generations of men, told they were worthless violent
and unstable by 'science'
prove that they are a-ok gentlemen.

An older woman brings layers and layers of rich emotional
experience to her every move , deed, wish.
Hell, this makes even me want to hook up with him.
I'm a sucker for a nice smile DB
You sound like a great couple. Enjoy!
Verily, verily! (Nice conversation today with the Handsome John aunt!)
You two make a very nice couple, having met both I can say that. But I can't figure out what a MILF or a DILF is. I know I'll feel silly after you explain. Stay happy and together!
I'm with Fusun and am waiting for the translation. Otherwise, fun post.
Your relationship just sounds like fun.
Sounds lovely all round! :-)
Dad's or Mother's I'd like (to) fuck
Thank you, tr ig. I didn't know that, so I don't feel silly. :o)
I think there is something interesting in this narrative. Hard to find with all the qualifications.,

There is way too much protesting that it is all innocent.

The step d's friend that hits on moms -- that guy is really slimy. But an interesting character.

There are a couple of really interesting stories buried here.
enjoyin the story & dont have any idea at all why you're passing up on your daughter-in-laws bf... ps this reminds me of the show "modern family" which Ive started watching.. with you as the sofia vergara character haha
ps not really followin how the daughter in law didnt smack the "kinda bf" when he started hitting on you. yeah it really is a brave new world I guess. somehow not in this neighborhood. but somewhere.
Haha, lots of fun and funny comments. Trig, you should find out from your son sometime if any of his women friends though you were cute. Nick, there is no protesting, I find it amusing that women will openly go on and on how good looking someone else's boyfriend (or husband) is. These two- his daughter and her friend- are 19. They were just entertaining us with stories of their lives, which we found amusing but also slightly gross. TMI, we finally said, TMI.
I was halfway through your post when I realized what a DILF was. I'm a bit slow.
My handsome has no children so he is not a DILF. He is an ILF of some kind. I prefer that others not tell me what fantasies of theirs in which he may play a role in their head ;0)
Loved this piece, especially after meeting you and your Handsome John and seeing how well you two do mesh (as much as one can in a public bar). Send me some of your luck.
Paul- I am not sure your wife would say the same, but only because she is too classy and has a better term for it in Latin.

Dorinda- Yes, an Ilf. I think there were a few of those in Lord of the Rings, hmmm hmm Legolas.

Mary- and I thank you for letting me know you'd never hit on my man. J came to work with me the other day to fix a printer, and one of the patients saw him. When I mentioned he was with me at work, she said "oh, that handsome guy? I totally noticed him." Headsmack. I will go bar hopping with you when you're out next (not weekend of the 10th, I hope) and you can see if there are any more Ilfs left in town (the single variety, that is). As to the young man last night, he was definitely not for me, at any age.
Very interesting post. You sound like a good couple...that alone is a feat.
I get the point behind this but hate hate hate the desciptors, DIlF
OS cut off my comment, so sorry, the descriptors: DILF, MILF
cut off again.. forget it.
Rated anyway.
I am not sure about the full meaning of MILF and DILF, but am pretty sure I know what the F is. The dating world has gotten far too complicated, glad I'm on the bench. Nice piece and R.
I object to the description - I am her fourth husband rather than the fifth :)