With the clock ticking down to America's most famous day for eating, drinking and farting gluttony, it's time to talk turkey.  Nothing says Thanksgiving like a good old-fashioned, knock-down, drag out fight over how a turkey should be prepared. Thanksgiving would not be the holiday that it is wi/… Read full post »

In my lifetime, I have tripped and stumbled over, gotten thrown off course and been sideswiped or diverted by, had a couple of nasty head-on collisions with and was once even struck (like lightning) by this thing that I thought was love cannot adequately explain or define.  I think I was/… Read full post »

Let me start off by saying that “losing your virginity” is not like losing a pair of Lucky Brand jeans glasses or your car keys.  Blue jeans cost money and glasses and car keys basically have only two job descriptions: 

1.  To get your vehicle or your eyes started/… Read full post »

"You know I love you, baby. You know I do.  But there's just one thing you CAN'T DO...  You can't be somebody different every night."

Truer words have never been uttered by many men directly to women spoken.  That doesn’t mean that men aren’t thinking them.  It… Read full post »

I’m all for romance but I know that the road to love is rarely paved with it.  At best, it’s spotty.  The road that is, not the sheets.    I have out romanced just about every person I will ever know.  Forget the striptease soufflé or chocolate covered/… Read full post »

Me:    Hello?

Him:  Hey, how are you?

Me:    I’m very well thank you, how are you?

Him:  I’m good.  You wanna do this?

Me:    Yeah, sure.  This is very romantic.

Him:  How do we start?… Read full post »

Because if I am going to get "poked", I want to feel it.

I already have a closet full of Manolo Blahnik shoes; I don’t need virtual ones.

I don't really care who what you ate for dinner.

Your children and your pets… Read full post »

You’re all dying to find out what happened next, aren’t you?  Let’s just put it this way.  You know that you are having fabulous sex when you don’t have visions of somebody else random thoughts parachuting through your mind in the middle of all that sweaty, naked act/… Read full post »

8:17 pm:  This is going really too well.  He has proven consistently that he knows how to use a knife and fork correctly, has impeccable manners, can carry on intelligent conversation about numerous subjects and is both engaging and fascinating.  Plus, he hasn’t said or done anyt/… Read full post »

I have always been sexual fearless.  Reckless, no, fearless, yes.  I am not to be dared, folded, spindled or mutilated.  That would make me a piece of postage male (except for the “dared” part).  But ever since discovering that lump, fear had slipped under the w… Read full post »

11:03 am:  "There is one call ahead of you.  Please continue to hold or press 1 to leave a message and someone will return your call as soon as possible".

11:05 am:  I am on hold if you haven't figured it out.  I have been on "hold"  listening to the… Read full post »

WARNING:  Graphic images at end.

Look down at your chest.  Imagine a 13-inch needle probing your right breast that had been inserted at what would be the three o’clock position if someone were facing you.  In other words, the needle went into my breast through the inside… Read full post »

My name was called and I passed through the portal of hell between not having sex cancer or finding out if I did. I was pretty sure by the way my doctor spoke to me at her office and subsequently (numerous times) on the phone, followed by the urgency of the/… Read full post »

“He has really big hands,” I was warned by several friends of mine who had known other women who had used the famous oncologist I was about to meet.  I allowed my mind to ponder if that meant (what women believe to be true) that the surgeon also had a big/… Read full post »

Was it just yesterday I was saying that life has its lumps?  Why yes, that was me, sugar cube.  Today it has been more like a bowl of cherries (Rainier, thank you very much; those sound so Monegasque, n’est-ce pas?).  She’s acting all Frenchie, going off topic already and c/… Read full post »

Life comes with lumps.  I just don’t like them in (no particular order) my gravy, pillow, mattress or anywhere near or on my body.  I’m not particularly fond of clowns or magicians either (if I’m going to be sawed in half, at least do it in such a way that you/… Read full post »

 It seems that john blumenthal is a glutton for punishment. And where better a place to get some good old fashioned punishment than from the woman who knows men better than most men know themselves better than the the (slowly) recovering O'Really?.  He's a big talker you know and we shared… Read full post »

As I get older, it seems that there isn’t enough time to do everything I want to and certainly less than enough of it to go around to get certain men things done that need doing.  This cuts severely into my afternoon sessions of self-satisfaction ability to concentrate on important matters/… Read full post »

I read john blumenthal's post this morning with great dismay amusement.  I'm still looking for the  joke  perfect response and humbly offer my own on behalf of the kinder, gentler sex.  In the exact order as his original "observations", I submit the following thoughts for your con… Read full post »

Shoes.  I like shoes.  A lot.  I have lots of them.  When I say “lots” I don’t mean like 20 or 30 pairs of shoes.  I’m talking a ridiculously high number that borders somewhere between “what has she been smoking?” and “is she buying/… Read full post »

People throw around the words “normal” and “typical” like I do pantyhose Advil.  The longer I live, the more convinced I have become that not everyone throws around pantyhose like I do is “normal” or even “typical”.  I mean, when did picking y… Read full post »

You know the old saying about people coming in all shapes and sizes?  Agreed.  But forget about shapes and sizes.  This is not preschool.  The operative word here is “coming”.  People come from different backgrounds, histories and experiences replete with differen/… Read full post »

I was having dinner with a fairly recently widowed and very close friend of mine the other evening.  Her husband has been “gone” for about 20 months now.  Okay, there was a lot of him that was missing for several years before that.  The poor man didn’t leave the house/… Read full post »

It seems that my last foray into what women talk about and do when they are together really want from men has struck a g-spot nerve.  In the interest of moving both males and females into the bedroom  toward more positive, open and honest sex relations, I thought it would be/… Read full post »

I got to spend the weekend looking at some really beautiful male specimens with some of my favorite gal pals. A women’s weekend also known as a “giney fest” as opposed to an all male gathering which would be referred to as a “weenie roast” always makes for interesting m… Read full post »