I spent the first few months trying to rest up after years of heart ache, turmoil, disappointment, and simple lack of sleep…

Yet I always found myself reaching for my ‘cover’ when I went outside…where was my cap?

I had to stand, and stare at a closet full of… Read full post »

Unspoken words

Amidst a half full glass of wine

You gave your support

Filling my glass that was once

Half empty

Yet now I find myself

Filling the glass

With dreams

Hopes

And false praise

Those triumphs are muddled… Read full post »

While the smell of hair dye

Is drowned out by the aroma of cheap, boxed wine

We smile

We light our candles, scented with lilacs

Without a care in the world

So we choose

At that moment

To fill our half full glasses…… Read full post »

The pain the shadows my past have cast

Have left an abundance of grey hair, wrinkles, and thinning hair

But my life is honestly no different

From anyone else that has dealt with trials

Hardships, loss, and pain

I’ve lost enough in my life… Read full post »

The old oak tree sits nestled

Firmly

In the center of the yard,

Sits proudly

With roots that intertwine

Beneath the soil of the earth

Its branches reach up

To an endless sky

That welcomes the budding leaves

With sunshine and… Read full post »

I come from a long line of military heroes.  I can’t recall the entire line of heroes that paved the path I came to walk upon, but I can tell you that my Father, Uncle, and Grandfather led the way for the inspiration of my career. 

This piece will… Read full post »

Jealousy can seethe the soul

And bring you to a wretched place

That I had hoped to never visit

This destination I’d rather leave unknown

Unvisited

And undiscovered

Often finds itself knocking on my door

Yet I find myself peering into the vision… Read full post »

Sleepless nights

Filled with mixed emotions

And empty aches

Tugging at your heart

You are left alone to deal

With temper tantrums

Band-Aids

And broken hearts

Dust piles up

Carpet needs a scrub

And dishes pile up in the sink… Read full post »

Rain, Rain, go away…

I need to run…

I need to be released from the pressures of life

Of being a single Mom without help

Without even being able to

Run errands

On my own

Seems small…I’m sure…

But after years of… Read full post »

Support is given, and received on many different levels.  My sister sang, “The Wind beneath my Wings” when she was nearing graduation, and I remember clearly sobbing as if I had lost my best friend.  She was leaving for college, and our time together was over for a moment. … Read full post »

As if I were a wallflower imprinted on tattered old wallpaper that once were brightly lit with sunshine and color, I found my colors beginning to fade…The outlines were still visible showing a glow that could light up even the darkest of days. 

These flowers were often counted and… Read full post »

A runner…

My ‘ode’ to running

A runner runs through the pain

Embraces swollen and bruised toes

Knowing with each step

They are one step closer to their finish line

A runner’s legs are often sore

But continue… Read full post »

I hate how I feel today.  Even after an amazing day with my family, I am left with a hole in my heart I just can’t seem to fill tonight.  I cried saying goodbye to my folks and my sister even though they are only hours away…

I am realizing… Read full post »

My Air Force wings

Are now

Retired

20 years put behind me

In a midst of memories

That haunt me at times

Yet those wings

Once plastered upon my sleeves

Are hanging in a closet

Never to be worn again…… Read full post »

Just wanted to say it isn't because I haven't wanted to write...

more so, the time escapes me...

but

I graduate

THIS week...

and I think my time will finally

start to be,

my own. 

xoxoxo

Thanks all for the love and support, know I am with you all, always. … Read full post »

I have spent the better part of my life, over half in fact serving my country while enlisted in the Air Force.  I joined to “Fly, Fight, and win.”  Yet although I DID enlist, I found myself in a hospital job that I did NOT want, or love at the time. … Read full post »

39 things

1.      I enlisted in the Air Force at the age of 17 with my parents signatures as I wasn’t 18 yrs. old

2.      I have fished in dozens of lakes, to include the waters of Canada, with great joy.

3.      I wa… Read full post »

The beauty that once encompassed

My face,

My hair,

My eyes…

Is now lost amidst

A field of crevices

Which are referred to as “laugh lines”

I wish these lines were cause due to laughing

Yet I know the past

Has… Read full post »

So many over emphasize

A day that glorifies

Balloons filled with

Shallow breaths

Flowers that were picked

For merely a random soul...

Sweet chocolate

That holds an underlying bitter taste

Because the mouth of the giver

Is sour instead of sweet… Read full post »

I see, hear and read posts and blogs of people who have handfuls of friends standing by them through their life.  These friends are there for celebrations, mourning of lives lost, and day to day events.  Most of these people have lived in the same place their entire life, or at/… Read full post »

Old friends can often

Be referred to

As a warm fire

These friends are able

To light your soul

With casual conversation

Finding a way into your past

Yet lighting a path

To a future untold

Knowing roads traveled

As if… Read full post »

I closed the weathered

Tattered

Yet solid and well-built oak polished door

My hope

And desire

Was to diminish

The aching pain in my soul

With a run filled with endorphins

It worked

Momentarily

Yet daily mundane chores… Read full post »

I, for once in many years

Could care less about the famous

Football game televised tonight. 

Football, for me

Always meant Sunday’s full

Of food and festivities

Yet this Sunday

Brought a quiet and aching air

Of pain… Read full post »

I learned a lot today.  More than I had hoped or expected to, but if you know me, you know I am always trying to gain new knowledge be it with life, work, or family/friends. 

I know I’ve said it before, but pardon my repeat sentences…my husband finally left… Read full post »

I’ve been in this place

More times than I count…

Bags being packed

Uniforms folded neatly

With military corners pressed

Very few see the trials

That lie within the life of a military spouse

Yet the night before

The departure… Read full post »