- Park Slope, New York,
- Ink, Inc.
- Light verse is my medium
For the war on tedium.
Draw up a comfy chair,
Give a look right here.
What've you got to lose
Other than the blues?
Think of this as an app
To make you a cheerier chapp.
MY RECENT POSTS
- Crunchtime in New York
May 24, 2013 07:46AM
- That Legendary Glass
May 23, 2013 09:23AM
- Mad Menu
May 22, 2013 11:01AM
- Impressionism Prism
May 21, 2013 10:06AM
- In the Spring A Young Man's
May 20, 2013 10:54AM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “Confession: I am.”
- “Dear Mr Walrus man--as
my mother would say,
May 19, 2013 10:03AM
- “Words failed
have kept his nose to the
May 19, 2013 10:01AM
- “Brilliant satire. Better
than 99% of the humor in the
May 18, 2013 09:40AM
- “A flogger?”
May 16, 2013 05:57PM
Leon Freilich's Links
So is the glass half-empty or half-full?
Why, neither. It's fatally cracked, and that ain't bull. Read full post »
The cashier eyed me
I wasn't the customer
He'd been wishin'.
The diner sign
We accept cold cash
But not hot plastic.
But what's there to say?
Neither could their mother.
For people and things,
Couples and flings,
Leads to spring clearing.
Wally Striver watched his health,
Following all the rules,
Stressing beta carotene
Foods as good as jewels.
Net effect was energy bonus,
Making a healthy fellow,
Even if the B-C sources
Turned him orange-yellow.
Righteously most every day
Twelve glasses of water he downed
Till the aquatic month… Read full post »
Imagine if Repubs succeed
In repealing Obamacare. Indeed!
What other noxious programs will
They take on in this holy drill?
Just might begin with… Read full post »
Dig in, my hungry friend,
If lotsa fat's your end.
All that you can store.
Next time you're tempted by carrion,
Consider becoming vegeta
The road to hell is paved with good intentions
Powered by lifestyle-changing new inventions. Read full post »
You say you're stressed and tense
And nothing seems to make sense?
Your belly's a falling fence
Battered by suspense?
Feel life's a horrid pretense,
A capital offense?
Shrinks are an expense
Fit only for the dense,
And sanity won't commence
Neither now nor hence?
Life offers its two cents
As you hate the pres
… Read full post »
Yet the bathtub still gets his dander up.
He barks and cries and shakes and fusses
And eased into the water, cusses.
Bandy's greatest fear's the tub--
He thinks the water means glub-glub.
And yet when we walk him in the park
He seeks out one thing like… Read full post »
When the economy’s starved
It needs to be fed
But once recovered
Time for diet instead.
And that at its briefest
Is the waxes-and-wanes
Of defeating recession
A la John Maynard Keynes.
No place anymore to close your eyes
And implore for growth in your dollar supplies.
No occasion to whisper to yourself
An invitation to the romantic elf.
The well, or fountain, has been paved over,
Rock-hard surface, not even… Read full post »
For interviews like Streisand and Bush.
What could the explanation be?
The Devil's got no book to push.
No babies cheesing on their bibs;
No screeching wheels to pierce your ears,
No cash appeals from "volunteers";
No sweltering in your subway car,
No coughing caused by a lit cigar.
No need to park your automobile,
No spot, a thorough search'll reveal;
No parking lot… Read full post »
Or so the sociologists posit,
Before and after marriage
Along with these family randies
Were my many red-hot aunties,
Famous throughout the city
For needing asbestos panties.
But my best-known relative
Was a banker whose tactics were scary
Defrauding and ch… Read full post »
Vent away, vent away,
Let your voice be heard!
Send your temper soaring high
Flying like a bird.
Sure to get dramatic results
At this fervid pace,
Guaranteed you soon will be
Burning red in the face.
Or you could just stay mum,
… Read full post »
Under FEMA’s policy, co-ops are considered businesses and
therefore ineligible for federal disaster aid. -- New York Times,
May 2, 2013
--Business, I should say--
Ten dollars, please,
If you want to stay.
Coffee and some pie,
Tea and madeleine?
Fun is fun--but what's funny?
Everybody knows sunny,
Cloudy and rainy and windy as well,
But funny somehow's harder to tell.
Yes, it has to make you laugh,
Even if springing from someone's gaffe
Plus you might go and guffaw
(Not so nice but within the law).
What then constitutes what's… Read full post »
Whether the victim's woman or man,
Venerate the Constitution
As the fulltime, alltime solution
To the ills besetting the nation
Dating back to the day of creation
(The Tuesday before the Ice Age,
Known since then as the Days of Rage).
Asked to describe the Constitution
Leon Freilich's Favorites