Lea Lane

Lea Lane
Florida, USA
August 26
author, Travel Tales I Couldn't Put in the Guidebooks, available at Amazon.com and on Kindle
“I’ve discovered the secret of life,” Kay Thompson, the eccentric entertainer and “Eloise” author, once said. “A lot of hard work, a lot of sense of humor, a lot of joy and a lot of tra-la-la!” And that's been my life: As a travel writer for over 30 years, I've been around the block (more like around the world), and I write true stories about interesting people and places. (Check out my travel site, Travels With Lea.) I've lived an unconventional life in conventional trappings. Been a corporate VP, worked with foster kids, acted in an Indie ("Nurse 1"), was on Jeopardy!. I've been managing editor of a travel publication, written for the Times, and authored books. OS is my home, but I also blog on The Huffington Post, and I've contributed (mostly anonymously) to everything from encyclopedias to guidebooks. Married young, divorced late; married late, widowed early, I dated lots in-between -- and survived a scary illness. After being happily, peacefully solo for many years, I'm now happily married again. I founded and still edit www.sololady.com, a lifestyle Website for single women. I'm truly grateful for each precious day, each well-earned wrinkle, my family, my cat. Truth, laughter, friendship, late love. And this blog -- on this wonderful site!

Lea Lane's Links

MAY 8, 2012 9:08AM

Two Dog Years

Rate: 38 Flag


When you get to a certain age, life can be counted in dog years, when every year takes on the meaning of seven. Things get speeded way up, faster and faster, seasons blending and blurring. So much happens, some of it critical.

Two years ago Bill and I married, but in some ways it feels like fourteen years, or even more. Maybe forever.

This is truly late love: he's in his 70s and I'm almost there. But it's surprising to both of us how much it feels like first love. Aging doesn't stop the romance, and no matter where you are now, the feelings of first love can come -- again --  when you least expect it.    

But there are realities that come with aging. I was in and out of hospitals for much of last year. And then I was incapacitated for a couple of months, hooked to an IV.

For years I had lived alone and faced illness alone, and dealt with it. I was not used to someone being there for me. I toughed it out, as so many of us do.

But during this illness, there wasn't a single time I went for medical appointments or testing that Bill wasn't at my side. He took off from work every time no matter my protests.

And while I was on the IV he nursed me by clearing the lines twice a day himself, without question. He wanted to do it, to show me he was there for me. And throughout my recuperation he followed up with the same caring attention.

Sweet notes and affectionate words make me feel appreciated. Laughs and cuddles make me feel whole. But Bill's devotion is what makes me feel truly loved.

Take it from one who has lived long and sometimes hard, and for many years, alone: kindness is what you should seek. Kindness is what you should give back. That capacity, the capacity to give and to care, leads to real love.

Happy Anniversary, dear Bill. Thank you so much for loving me in sickness as well as health. And let these words remind you that I will always be there for you: in real years, in dog years, in all years.










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You are one lucky woman. Hope to meet you and Bill when you are in Maine this summer. Think Lobsta'...HAPPY ANNIVERSARY.
And to Bill : You are one lucky guy!
Have a happy anniversary. You are both very lucky. R
A happy anniversary to you and Bill indeed. You are very lucky and I look to your experiences for hope. Also wish you and Bill the good health you both deserve.
Sometimes you get lucky. And sometimes you don't. Been in both situations. The key is to keep on keeping on and seek things that really matter. Otherwise, forget it.
Bless you both, Lea! Such a fine perspective, here!

This is beautiful and wise, Lea. My best to you both.
Happy Anniversary Lea and Bill - what a handsome fella
It's obvious you two deserve each other. Happy second, and many more to come.
What Ande said.
Happy Anniversary. I started to say "lucky you," but luck seems to indicate that you didn't earn it. And it sounds like you both did and do. May you have many more happy years together.
Beautiful tribute to your love, Lea. Happy Anniversary!
A very happy Anniversary to you both, Lea. I know a little about that "late love" thing myself. Mel and I have been married now since 2001 and I was fifty-one, she was forty-eight when we married and it was not until then that I discovered what real love was supposed to feel like. I sometimes wish that we had met and fell in love in our twenties because of all the years we wasted being apart but I'm not sure either of us would have survived! When I met her was the first time I ever wanted to live to be a hundred.
This resonates with me so much. I can see the kindness in his eyes, his smile. I hear it in your words of love and appreciation. I wish you both a wonderful anniversary.
congrats....peace and health to you both...
Kindness is the strongest aphrodisiac in the world. You just have to realize it.
And David, I'm so happy for you. You met in the now, and that is the best place to be.
Happy Anniversary! I wish you kindness and love for the rest of your days. Or dog years.
Celebrate by having a 3 dog night.
Lea, I too finally have someone that cares about every ache and pain and whatever.. These guys are so hard to find and I am so glad you have found each other.
Nothing but the very best to both of you.
On a serious note, I've played Bill's role in my "late in life" relationship. Sometimes he frets that instead of making life easier for me, as was his goal, he's added that much more trouble. But he continues to be the kind, thoughtful friend with whom I love to converse, debate, trade witticisms... Such a friend makes life worth living, and not everyone finds this. I'm glad you have done so.
Congratulations, and happy anniversary. You sound like a great couple.
Because you found each other you're a lucky lady and he's a lucky guy.
A good man is hard to find -- lucky you. As you know, I know something of what you speak, so I know just how good a man Bill is. I must also add that Bill obviously knows a good thing when he finds it, too.
And as I never miss an opportunity for political comment, let me say I've observed that President's age in dog years, too. Obama looks at least ten years older than when he took office. God bless him for wanting four more years of insults and intransigence.
How wonderful that you've both found love and will be celebrating this anniversary. I wish you many years of happiness to enjoy together!
Happy Anniversary, Lea and Bill! And thank you, Lea, for reminding me of something I needed to hear this morning.

A beautiful tribute. So poignant and sincere...
Wonderful to read this--and happy anniversary.
You two deserve each other. I'm so happy for you both.
Thanks for the good wishes. I will print this post out and present it to Bill, tonight.
And Snippy, I've been on the other side of it too, which sometimes can be even harder. Sometimes it's easier to give than receive, but it's best to do be able to do both.
Kindness, just that, as you described it, is everything, colors everything. I'm amazed at how little we understood of that when we were young and thinking there was a whole long list of important qualities. I'm delighted for both of you, Lea. This is the sweetest anniversary card.
You deserve a great big Bow WoW!
Oh gosh- sobbing here and nodding. Great picture and tribute to your guy. Hugs and congratulations to you both. Love, D&R
A very Happy Anniversary to you both Lea and Bill!
Happy anniversary! Bill is cuuuute.
Aww...How beautiful! Happy Anniversary! And many happy returns.
Good health to you both.
Mazel tov on your anniversary, Lea! How wonderful to have a loving, kind, wonderful partner. Wishing you many more years of health and happiness.
Happy Anniversary!! That was a such a romantic piece of writing. He is one handsome guy and it seems he is even more beautiful in his love for you.
Kindness -- so simple...so important. I'm a Bill fan now.
And MH, I'm your fan. Talk about kindness!
Kindness is the key. And generosity, which is so clear in Bill's caring for you. As always, you nailed it.. and described it so beautifully I'm a little ferklempt. Happy and Healthy Anniversary to Lea and Bill with much love.
Nice that you found such a wonderful companion at this stage Lea. Perhaps I shouldn't give up hope. Your dogs years analogy fits well with a theory I've long believed.

Perception of time seems to work on a mathematical formula according to one's age. At 10 a year is 10% of your life and seems to take forever. At 50 the same period is only 2% and goes by rather too quickly. I notice this at work where Friday rolls around much faster than I ever remembered. Unfortunately so does Monday.
Time speeds up even more in your 60s. That's why I keep moving, trying to catch up with it.
Enjoyed your very personal statement of what relationships really mean. Yes, there we you need it. How richer the wine when tasted with time well meant and true ...
Enjoyed your very personal statement of what relationships really mean. Yes, there we you need it. How richer the wine when tasted with time well meant and true ...
I don't mean to be a downer but it puts me in mind of that Pink Floyd song Time:

So you run and you run
To catch up with the sun
But it's sinking

Racing around
To come up behind you again
Sun is the same in a relative way but you're older
Shorter of breath
And one day closer to...
Well, that is a bit of a downer. (But not untrue.)
Tears...tears. Oh my word, you have summed up romance so well. Without commitment and life's brutal realities, there is no way that love can ever turn into LOVE. Gorgeous...
I am so happy to read this! You are both so beautiful. I think love in any age is a miracle, and we who are so blessed must remember it every day. So glad you shared this.
You both have twinkles in your eyes and the glow of love...I have seen it. I don't think I ever told you, but your love story guided me to mine! Thanks...and the kindness and humor are THE most important traits to have.
He looks very kind (and handsome!)
I'm happy for you both Lea!