One day at a time...

soaking up each and every one of them!

Cathy GF

Cathy GF
The Bay and The Lake, California, USA
December 29
Living the adventure of change


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MARCH 8, 2012 10:19PM

Wanting To Grow Up Was A Big Misunderstanding

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Funny thing is, they never tell you the "true facts" about growing up.

Not Mom or Dad.  Not your teachers. Surely, not your brothers or sisters or your supposed friends.  Not even the good ones.

No one ever tells you what growing up is really like.

And we certainly don't always like it.  Or what happens while we do it. While we are trying to do it right.  

The rules for growing up may have changed since we were doing it, or attempting to do it.  I'm not sure, but it seems like the game plan has changed along the way.

I look at what my parents did and what they told us to do and more often, what not to do.  Did it anyway.  That's part of growing up, right?  Afraid so.

So, we spend about the first fifteen years saying things like, "I'm almost 9. I'm 11 and 3/4's.  I'm going to be 14 this year.  I can't wait to turn 7, 8, 10, 13...start wearing a bra!  Kiss my first boy!  (Olden days)  First girl!  Or kiss a damn frog.  Kiss something!"

You can bearly remember going from diapers to training pants (no Pampers, then).  Things were more 'real' then.  Cotton.  Not chemically treated absorbant paper products.  Upon which, we place our precious babie's bottom skin.  For shame!  Yet, so convenient and 'modern.'

Loved to watch my mom put on mascara and pretty dresses, which she filled out; something I never imagined I would ever do. Barely ever did, till I hit my fifties.  They say, "Some things never change."  I 'm here to tell ya, "Lots of things change."  And grow.  And grow.  And like the comedians often tell us..."and growing in places you never deamed of seeing stuff grow."

Kids wanting to be teenagers.  Teens wanting to be adults.  All of us wanting to get out of school; graduate, graduate again and again and get on with life.  Get a cool job.  (screeching halt)  Where did all the cool jobs go?

So, maybe dad's job wasn't super cool afterall.  He gained weight, drank too much, yelled at us, looked so sad and talked about "stress," a little known substance to us little kids, at the time.  We all have had a taste of those menu selections, now, haven't we?

But Dad was super cool on so many other levels (though, at the time, Dad had no idea what those other levels were).  Scratches head.  He did that a lot.  Now, I know why.  With all the wanted kids, came all the stress that accompanies raising a big family.  And yet, they seemed to 'have it all.'

Or so we thought.

Then it became 'our turn.'  Our time to grow up; leave the nest, find a substantial living, because, Lord knows, 'it takes a village' to build one and to work one's way up the invisible ladder to God knows where.  Had to be somewhere, though.  It was expected, after all.  We've all been there at one time or another.

Me thinks the time for growing up is now.  All that time, when we were little, wanting to be older, grow up fast, get to wherever we thought we were going to get to... and now we are where we are.  Somewhere over or under the rainbow, we have, indeed, arrived.

Some may say it is exactly where they want to be, are meant to be, dreamed to be, hoped to be and so on.  Others may react a bit differently to this outcome.  Others may wonder to this day, why they wanted to grow up in the first place.  What was the big hurry?  What could be done differently, to effect a different reality.  Regrets, hindsight, awesome delight, denial, joy and many combinations of all that there is waiting for us when we do, in fact, grow up.

In some ways, I don't ever remember the exact time of arrival.  The train attendant announced the destinations, one after the other, but I was somewhere else...hoping to be somewhere promised and unknown . Dreaming of being a kid again; the fun we had, the carefree days, weeks, months and years that melted into now.  The popsicles in the summer by the lake...any lake.

I had one today, even though it had crystalized from being in the freezer too long (you know what I mean), but who cares?  It's a yummy popsicle and a purple one to boot! Every frosty bite and lick of it's juiciness, reminded me of my childhood, it's amazing innocence, it's pranks, it's growing pains and it's resultant presence.  

I was (am) happy to be in the now.  It wasn't all for naught.  It was incredible to take a little break from the inevitable, to sit outside on an uncomfortable chair and taste the sweetness of my youth in a moment of reflection.  The sun hitting my face till it tingled a little (taking in the Vitamin D), remembering what it was like to be small and hyper (like my grand kids) and relish in the memories.

In all our moments...we are making memories.  There is no going back.  No remorse or thoughts of what could have been.  Only our precious now...and the ability to look forward, one day at a time, knowing that there 'was' a time, when all this seemed a distant and strange conjuring of mysteries to come. 

Whatever it is... it is here now. 





Photo credits to Graydon and Sydney Rose (my Grand babies, of course) 



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It actually is great to be the Gramma!
'In all our moments...we are making memories' Absolutely every second. I try to make them all worth something. Great post. I bet you are the world's best Gramma!
Good being a Papaw as well,
Fortunately, you can live a full life without conclusive proof of growing up. I just stopped thinking about it.
desert_rat - They are all worth something...and again, something else! And, it is what I strive for in this chapter of my growing up years!

JMac - But of course!

Nick - ..."you can live life without conclusive proof of growing up...!
Couldn't have said that better! Love it!
The joy of grandbabies...I know, I know. Enjoy the now, we don't know what tomorrow will bring. So wisely said. R
Welcome to that destination called "Contentment!"

Do you, as did I, find that you've gone full circle from the contentment of childhood to the contentment of maturity? All I lost along the way was a great many illusions; and I actually managed to learn a few things!!

Enjoy your popsicle!!!
Sky - Yes! A full circle, indeed! You nailed it!
Trudie - Thanks so much and for coming by!
Oh, Cathy, what a pleasantly sentimental piece. It certainly enhanced my mood much. Kudos on the grandchildren. R
Every day is a memory and if ya dont slow down ya might miss it.
I cannot eat popsicles because I have this thing with the sticks.. it slike nails going down a blackboard.. had it since I was a child.. memories..:)
Grow old with grace and grey hair, remember the time of youth, forget where your car keys are, sit back and appreciate the sunset, don't bother counting them, just enjoy. Nice post!
Popsicles! You know, we call them "ice blocks" down here.

Do you have another purple one I can share with you, Cathy? We can stick our tongues out at each other and delight in how they've changed colour; go cross-eyed trying to see for ourselves; and just enjoy a good ol' giggle!!!

A lovely post, Gramma.

: )
Thoth - I am so happy you liked it! The grand kids are preventing me from growing up! Bless their little hearts!

Linda - Oh no! You must have bit into a popsicle stick when you were little and it sent the shivers up/down your spine! I can understand! Not all the memories are good ones, but they all validate where we've been...once upon a time...

Sheila - Yes, the grey hairs, they are a peeking through the temples and elsewhere! Those endless sunsets...countless and inspiring! Yes!
Should you need something to occupy your mind you can work on one of the great puzzles of all time; "Which came first, sunsets or dawns?"
I'm going with "the dawn of man."
I'm still waiting for "the dawn of man".........

No misunderstandings here, I really do want to grow up... right after I finish enjoying feeling young again. Hurray for second childhoods!
What a cute little girl! In our culture people don't realize what a great gift getting older and a bit wiser can be. if you don't stullify.
Mostly I'm fine with ageing. I am still healthy enough to appreciate everything more than when young. I only worry, rightly, that when I die which my guess, educated, will be in about 2 years, the kid will be a 27 year old orphan. But myself, I've done my work and I never believed I'd live so long. Now a little birdie one I totally trust says 'you have two more years'. My affairs are in order and I live life more intensely and even happily than ever. The kiddo, that is the rub, had her at 43. She is now25. Merely that. But she does have very close friends and life is what it is, never feared death-- nor do I now. R
Yes being here now is so very rewarding.

☼(ˆ◡ˆ) ⋱ ⋮ ⋰
(ˆ◡ˆ) ♥⋯ ❤ ⋯ ★
☼(ˆ◡ˆ) ⋰ ⋮ ⋱(¯`•´¯)¸.(¯`•´¯).¸.(¯`•´¯)¸.Have a Memorable WeekEnd NOW! ☼
(¯`•´¯)¸.(¯`•´¯).¸.(¯`•´¯)¸.(¯­`•´¯)¸.(¯`•´¯) ¸.(¯`•´¯).¸.(¯`•´¯)¸.Ŀ☼√Ξ ❤.
•¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•*´¨` *•.•¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•*´¨`*•.¸¸.•*­­´¨` *• Hugs ☼
On my mind, all the time. "I won't grow up, I don't want to wear a tie, and a serious expression, in the middle of July..."
You could not be more right and those kids are gorgeous. :)

The title - how right you are! How could any of us know time would go by so quickly? When you are young life looks so slow and flows like honey - until one day you realize that the cycle has started all over with us being the grown ups our little ones cannot wait to be.
It's not late to enjoy every day of your arrival and love those adorable grandbabies, the best gifts of your life.
Nice post Cathy! I am feel very much the same way lately. There are so many blessings for me to count. Being a "Baba" is right on top. (My daughter and grandson (Gray) are coming next week and that makes me so happy!)
Have a great weekend!
There's still a kid deep inside that can't believe the rest of him got so old.
Here's to Popsicle days, tho I much preferred Fudgesicles.
The popsicle is the perfect symbol of coming full circle in life. I think I'll buy some next time I go shopping. Lovely post, Cathy.

Nietzsche said, "Genius is childhood recaptured," but I'm not sure that is true for all of us.
Great post, Cathy. Sometimes though I feel like Peter Pan. "I'll never grow up." I think at least I've grown a little wiser. r
I no wanna grow up!! I REFUSE!! ~Stomps his feet~ :D

Delightful. I'll have a cherry popsicle!
Trudie - No greater joy in the world! Thanks for visiting!

Little Kate - Hah! Does that bring back memories! "My tongue is redder than yours!" Thanks, LK!

LH Bleue - Boy, is that ever true! I saw the movie, "Groundhog," and I like to think I can do it over and over again...some days...not others!

Sky - Really? I just saw him come streaking by my window the other day!

Patrick - "Stullify?!" Got me! I do embrace the wisdom that comes with age, however, had it come decades sooner, I might have made some better choices along the way. No complaints, though. It's all good!

Wendyo - Your comment has me a bit stunned. I don't know if I'd trust that birdie or not? You just keep those wings of yours airborne and soar higher and higher before you touch down again to enjoy another week, month, decade! Wishing you well and much life left on your dance card. Thanks for your sharing.

Agis - I will! In Chicago for 5 days and love this city more than most! Beautiful, sunny day, blue skies and refreshing nip in the air and I'm livin' large! Thanks!

Linnnn - I heard a familiar tune in your comment...thanks!

Jon - Why thanks so much!

Fusun - Lovely sentiment in your comment! And, yes, you know they are! Thanks!

Ladyfarmerjed - You have a "Gray," too! Such a great name it is! Enjoy you time with them~ Thanks

Stim - Ditto...big time!

Tom -Fudgesicles! The best! And root beer popsicles too! And when a young lass, the banana popsicles were my absolute favorite. Can't find them anymore...

Lezlie - Yes, coming full circle again and again. Ain't it the truth! Thanks!

Ben - I love that quote, be it varied and open to interpretation for many. I do embrace it's intrinsic meaning, as the babies in my life, sustain me and keep me young in heart. Thank you.

Christine - Yes! There is a Peter Pan in most of us, if we're lucky! And for me, a Tinkerbell, too! Thx!

Tink - "Will never grow up...never grow up...never grow Uhhh UP!!

Zumilicious - Love cherry, grape, lime, orange, root beer and even banana...back in the day!
What beautiful grand babies. Watching them grow is a muse unto itself.
rated with love
RP- what a wonderful response from you!!
Thank you so much!! xo
Loved reading this, thank you.