jlsathre

jlsathre
Location
Illinois,
Birthday
July 30
Bio
I'm a lawyer in my past life, who got the kids through college and decided to try something different and a little more fun. A used book store sounded like a good idea, so that's where I am for now. I just hadn't counted on a recession or E-readers and am a little afraid there's going to be a third act. In the meantime, I have plenty to read and a little time to write. Not a bad way to spend a day.

MY RECENT POSTS

Jlsathre's Links

Salon.com
FEBRUARY 21, 2012 9:58AM

No Cause for Alarm

Rate: 8 Flag

I woke up to an alarm clock yesterday for the first time in two weeks.  For those two weeks I hadn't needed one.  I woke up to my nine month old grandson babbling, or sometimes crying just a bit because I was a little too slow.  But always, come 7:00 a.m., he was standing in his crib, just barely tall enough to peek over the edge, anxious to start the day and to see who was coming to get him.  

For those two weeks I was the one who came.  His pudgy arms would reach up, and a smile would take over his face.  If not right away then just a bit later as we rested in the big bed together and practiced turning his "ba, ba, ba" babbles into a more interesting, "blah, blah, blah."  Or while we practiced playing hide-n-seek, and he'd crawl off and hide behind the door, and I'd crawl up and find him, and he'd smile that open mouth smile or that closed mouth grin of pure delight at seeing me.  And then squeal and take off again around the next corner.  It was the same smile that I got every time I walked in the door after getting coffee from downstairs. He'd look up, smile, wiggle out of his mom's arms and come crawling, head down in some sort of instinctive aerodynamic pose to get him there quick.

It is a blessing that grandkids come at the very time when our own aging becomes more noticiable. When we find ourselves dealing with the loss of parents and friends and mobility, and the only climbing we do seems to be relegated to getting to the top branches of the family tree.   When the two people who loved you first, and loved you most, are lost to time.  

My own parents died several years ago within a span of 16 months. A few doors closed to me then--or at least they didn't beckon. The two people who could always be counted on to smile when I walked through wouldn't be there to tell me every time that it's been too long and that they were happy to see me no matter what.   

I know that the smiles from my grandson aren't duplicates of the smiles from my parents--that those smiles are reserved for the ones we birthed. My grandson will grow up and all too soon find himself busy with legos, and soccer, and life. The day will come that he won't look up and won't see that I'm smiling on the other side.

For right now it doesn't seem cause for alarm. His smile woke me up. 

 

 

 

 

Author tags:

aging, grandkids

Your tags:

TIP:

Enter the amount, and click "Tip" to submit!
Recipient's email address:
Personal message (optional):

Your email address:

Comments

Type your comment below:
legos and soccer and how the hell am I gonna get a job? (but legos really are ubiquitous across all generations...they're like magic in a bucket). I'm not a huge fan of procreation to give one's life meaning, but the kid sounds cute,
How lovely. I love the line - When we find ourselves dealing with the loss of parents and friends and mobility, and the only climbing we do seems to be relegated to getting to the top branches of the family tree. So very true. I look forward to a grandchild someday. Your story made me smile vicariously. R
Mary--Yeah, I'm kind of missing it.
Malcolm--I agree with you on legos and procreation. But they both can give additional meaning.
Jane--The smile will get you every time.
Rita--Thank you. I waited quite a while for mine. He was worth it.
The same one that used to only know you through skype? Seems that worked out pretty well. What a delight. If we could only retain or recover some of that childlike innocence and delight as we get old(er). Actually I do believe we can. Cool post jl
The most simple things are most often the most beautiful. It almost makes me wish I had a baby some where around in my life.... almost ;-)
Tr ig--Yep, same boy. Flat grandma translated just fine.
Pensive--Babies are indeed nice, but also exhausting. I may not have covered that.
This was so beautiful. Just so beautiful. I'm so glad you had such a great time with your grandson. Thank you for sharing how you felt here, so perfectly.
Alysa--Thank you for your nice words.
DUTY! Good. I love duty.Especially when it involves laying on the lovingkindness.

“t is a blessing that grandkids come at the very time
when our own aging becomes more noticiable…

the only climbing we do seems to be relegated to getting to the top branches of the family tree. “

A long long journey to get up there. It is what I do. I see mom and dad in my sisters.

They are preserved eternally within, the books of their lives written & decoded & deconstructed & appreciated by me, an avid reader.



Grandkids are of the Genetic Blood River. They cannot help but be like their parents.
And their parents’ parents. That is BOTH NATURE (GENES) and NURTURE. BOTH.