I was given the task of assembling my sister’s new printer while I am babysitting Georgie Puppy this weekend.
I wasn’t in any kind of mood to do it, but I did.
I squatted on the floor caffeinate - ing and sighing heavily to clear my lungs. Georgie ate my cigarette case (one of those yellow ‘first aid’ little boxes: awfully ironic I thought…first aid…) while I was working. He kept coming into the room to nudge me and wreak havoc on my careful dexterous technological movements), so I got a bit short with him.
“if you don’t fucking fuck off, kiddo, I am gonna crate your ass and ignore you while you howl to the wind, ok?”
Later, I was so happy that I’d done my job successfully, I wasn’t mad at G.for eating my case. I need a proper one anyway. Not an ironic one whose irony is lost on most people, and makes me look like an impoverished hick .
I could make one from some other boxlike product out there I suppose, but cant think what would satisfy me for the long run. Something that goes solidly in your pocket and seems elegant. Like, well, a cigarette case, right? Where do you get one of them? A smoke shop I suppose.
I was pondering this on our walk when a woman jogged by with a beautiful canine running beside her tanned shorty-shorts-ed legs. I had to hold the lunging idiot beast I was accompanying and forgot to return her smile. Though I did manage a ‘’good morning”.
She no doubt pitied me for my untamed monster.
“She was nice” said Georgie.
“I didn’t notice her. You were leaping at her dog.”
“Then why not just let me jump where I wanna? I would not have hurt the dog. I liked her! I wanted to scuffle!”
“You cannot scuffle willy nilly with a lady, out on the trail, dumbass. When will you learn this?”
“I dunno. What is wrong with you, Uncle? You seem uptight. Enjoy the air. The smells. The world!”
“I have a stunted sense of smell due to cigarette smoking.”
“so stop! It is yucky anyway. Like Momma says.”
“Fine! Can we pick up the pace?”
“ok ok sorry”
Later, as he snuggled against my feet , I forgave the boy.