My Heart Speaks Here

One Realization, One Memory, One Story at a Time

heidibeth

heidibeth
Birthday
April 02
Bio
I'll tell you about my journey while I'm telling myself, rereading and saying aha! yes! and that is what it was like! Words have magic feet. I like to see them dance. The rest is to be kept quiet because it is sacred. How I watch people and love them never wondering if we'll agree. I love them because they are. I believe in words but they aren't everything. I'll take harsh speech and good deeds over eloquence and little helpful action in the world. There's shades of gray through everything which is one of many reasons I pray, "Thy Will not mine be done," trying not to cross my fingers but keep my eyes and heart open.

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Salon.com
MAY 18, 2012 4:28PM

anywhere

Rate: 4 Flag

“Adult” feels closed in, as if spontaneity must be set aside
for proper planning, a perfect shade of blue that never falters.
I'd rather grow up on a song and call it love,
let its shape evolve with every understanding.  

We're passing a garage sale somewhere in the US,
bits of a family's history laid out on green tarps
beneath late afternoon sun, the vibrating kind,
its light bouncing off passing car roofs,
greening trees, pleasing children unaware.

My husband is drawn to browse.
I look back down at the screen in my lap
grateful he keeps driving west,
think vaguely of the hours purging last summer,
our own lawn tarps covered in low-priced,
well-used gifts, thoughtful and thoughtless purchases
proved useful, empty floors freshly Swiffered,
bare walls, clean cabinets, our foot steps echoing
up and down double-checked walkways
before we locked the front door for the last time.

The open road offers its own challenges,
a vast space in which to listen to years gone by,
friendships we forget to connect to the future
and regret for such carelessness, a vague familiar
created by industry but nothing to memorize
as daily outside of our small traveling setup,
and a shimmering quiet asking us to fill it
with acted-on good intentions,
like singing with the family more,
writing now that time has opened,
and being awake for every sunrise,
knowing the long day stretches out,
waiting to see if we will keep our word.

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Comments

Type your comment below:
SUCH fine words, in poetic form.

especially:
Adult feels closed in, spontaneity must be set aside
for proper planning,
a perfect shade of blue that never falters.

I'd rather grow up on a song and call it love,
let its shape evolve with every understanding. "

like a garage sale! ha. yeah.
they are almost too intimate sometimes for me to paw through.
a family's history, up for Grabs.


well at least it goes somewhere else than the dump i suppose.


well now. i know this place:
"a shimmering quiet asking us to fill it
with acted-on good intentions,
Excellent -- it needs to be read more than once for all of the meaning....I identify with and can hear the footsteps walking down the "double-checked walkway"...really excellent.
friendships we forget to connect to the future
and regret for such carelessness

These words spoke to me. I have lost so many fine smart funny friends that I was too lazy to keep up with. I miss them all.

As always, Heidebeth, beautiful writing.
You are a gifted writer. This is so good. Don't ever quit. R