I was tutoring my third-grade student, Jas, a while ago. I was teaching her the fundamental concepts of Multiplication and I asked her to answer a worksheet. The first number looked something like this: 3 nines = 3 x ______.
Do you know what I made her do? First, I asked her to multiply the number 9 by itself three times. The answer, of course, is 729. This large number should have tipped me off and made me realize that I was doing something wrong. But no. I thought, "I'm the teacher, so I must be right. I must keep going, never let her see me sweat." So I said, "3 nines is 729. What times 3 would make 729?" I actually told her to divide 729 by 3 when she hasn't officially learned Division in school yet.
Later on, while she was answering another similar worksheet by herself, she came across an item that looked something like: 3 sevens = 3 x ______, and she quickly wrote down "7" on the blank and moved on to the next item.
I was stunned. Of course 3 sevens is three groups of seven! Of course the item is simply asking you translate the words into a mathematical equation! My God! The weight of my stupidity hit me right between the eyes, and I wondered for the recent umpteenth time, "Have I peaked?" I'm a tutor. I'm supposed to know these things. I'm only tutoring a 9-year old. I should be able to teach her all of her lessons in my sleep. Why did she spot something I should have spotted lightyears ahead first?
I know that some would definitely say I'm overreacting. But there's something about the process of teaching that calls into question everything you know, literally, at every moment and it's just . . . scary. You're always afraid you might get caught out, that you're just not good enough. And the fear is greater with smarter and quicker students. There was something about being in that moment, witnessing Jasmine write down that number "7" like it was nothing she had to think about. I felt and imagined the wheels of her brain running smoothly, while mine were all greased out.
Have any of you felt that way?
Do you know what I made her do? First, I asked her to multiply the number 9 by itself three times. The answer, of course, is 729. This large number should have tipped me off and made me realize that I was doing something wrong. But no. I thought, "I'm the teacher, so I must be right. I must keep going, never let her see me sweat." So I said, "3 nines is 729. What times 3 would make 729?" I actually told her to divide 729 by 3 when she hasn't officially learned Division in school yet.
Later on, while she was answering another similar worksheet by herself, she came across an item that looked something like: 3 sevens = 3 x ______, and she quickly wrote down "7" on the blank and moved on to the next item.
I was stunned. Of course 3 sevens is three groups of seven! Of course the item is simply asking you translate the words into a mathematical equation! My God! The weight of my stupidity hit me right between the eyes, and I wondered for the recent umpteenth time, "Have I peaked?" I'm a tutor. I'm supposed to know these things. I'm only tutoring a 9-year old. I should be able to teach her all of her lessons in my sleep. Why did she spot something I should have spotted lightyears ahead first?
I know that some would definitely say I'm overreacting. But there's something about the process of teaching that calls into question everything you know, literally, at every moment and it's just . . . scary. You're always afraid you might get caught out, that you're just not good enough. And the fear is greater with smarter and quicker students. There was something about being in that moment, witnessing Jasmine write down that number "7" like it was nothing she had to think about. I felt and imagined the wheels of her brain running smoothly, while mine were all greased out.
Have any of you felt that way?
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Kerry Lauerman
Joan Walsh
Salon.com
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