The Scarlet Letter

My clammy hands gripped the steering wheel while I focused on restraining my foot from pressing the gas pedal all the way to the floor. Breathe, I told myself. Relax. Deep breath in through my nostrils, taking in the bucolic beauty of our rural area. My throat was/… Read full post »

 From time to time, I receive lovely messages of support and encouragement through this blog from people who are either transgender themselves or are supporting a person who is. I enjoy this kind of connection as it somehow personalizes the whole experience to me even more. The messages from adu… Read full post »

In the past few months, we’ve really come a long way. I have always known our journey would take twists and turns, and while I consider myself open and flexible to changing course in my life, I guess I hadn’t really prepared for the agonizing decisions we would have to make… Read full post »

This past summer, we enrolled Alex in a local parks and rec summer day camp program. As a girl.

While this may seem for many to be either follow a natural course or even maybe not be a very big deal, it represented a big leap for her and for… Read full post »

In recent weeks, BoyGirPapa and I have had some heart-to-heart conversations with Alex about bullying, what it means to be different, and the people and communities who take a stand to show their support. We’ve introduced Alex to web sites like… Read full post »

In July 2010, life in the BoyGir house had reached a level that one might tag as “controlled chaos.” That is to say, things were on the brink of falling apart. BoyGir Papa was doing his best to hold the fort down, ensuring both kids reached their respective destinations (school and… Read full post »

I clearly recall the first time my perceptions of the gender binary were challenged in a public restroom. The year was 1997 and I was vacationing with a friend and his partner in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. I wasn’t married yet and didn't have kids. My friends and I had decided to… Read full post »

I have to be honest: I’m still high from the euphoria of the passage of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell on Saturday. So many of us never thought we’d see this day. I am eager to see what this means for civil rights and the citizens our country.

As an editor… Read full post »

It is becoming more and more evident in the days, months, years that pass, that the more we allow Alex the freedom to express himself, the more he gravitates towards any and everything feminine. Despite this, he does not reject his boy gender.

Alex is only seven. He is still defining… Read full post »

In past blogs, I've received some feedback about the name I selected for this blog. I suspect it's been a source of disgust for some, and for others--liberation. Whatever your opinion, to hear the term "girlyboy" is generally considered to be a provocative term; and yet, it most closely describes my… Read full post »

Recently, there has been a lot of media coverage on  some parents ("Nerdy Apple Bottom" and Cheryl Kilodavis) who have voiced their opinions about parenting their own "sparkly boys." It's been satisfying to watch this topic receive the attention it deserves, but it also begs the question (to the… Read full post »

For the past 1 year and 9 months, I have fantasized about Alex one day becoming a renowned ballet dancer. His skill and ability seemed above par. His interest and dedication to the art was focused and intent. Or so I thought.

I had often wondered if that duality ever… Read full post »

Sometimes, when I step back from my day-to-day routine and think about who my child is, his potential to do amazing things in this world, and how truly special and important it is that he can freely express himself, I’m literally overcome with emotion. I catch my breath and tears flow… Read full post »

In the seven years since his birth, Alex has taught me more about myself and humanity than all my 41 years, self-help books, and overseas volunteer experience combined. He continues to help everyone around him discover the inner beauty and unlimited potential when one is nurtured, loved, accepted, an… Read full post »

Every so often, curiosity gets the better of me and I find myself probing checking-in with Alex about where he’s at with things. Things like which gender he is identifying as in the moment and which gender he’s attracted to. Last night as I was laying in bed with him, the/… Read full post »

I learned on Tuesday that there was a scheduled event for today amongst many US teens in an effort to show support for anti-bullying laws and LGBT youth. I am remiss in only posting it today--the day of, but I feel like I need to do my part to help get the… Read full post »

I heard the gentle flapping of soft feet on hard wood well before he emerged from the darkness into the stark kitchen light. Judging by the timing of the stride, I knew it was Alex and not his three year old little brother. Instinctively or by habit, I felt myself tense… Read full post »

Before the winter olympics last month, the name "Johnny Weir" never even registered with me. Granted, we have opted out of the evil entity that is Cable TV, so we are somewhat insulated from the steady stream of media that soothes our society's addiction to information (by design, I might add).… Read full post »

Recently, I played the excerpts from the Dr. Oz show that dealt with transgender youth to Alex. I was curious to know what his reaction would be to seeing other "identified" transgender children.

He watched intently. At the moment when Dr. Oz said the word “transgender” he quickly p… Read full post »

I did not see this when it first aired, but I was informed that the video of Dr. Oz who interviewed families with transgender children is now available on YouTube.

 For those of you who may have stumbled upon this blog while searching for answers about your own child, just know… Read full post »

One Friday a few weeks ago, Alex dressed himself in a pink striped sundress over his jeans and t-shirt. As he was slipping his feet into his shoes, I broached the topic carefully.

“Are you sure you want to wear that?”

“Yeah,” he replied dismissively.

“O… Read full post »

Gender fluidity is a phenominally cramazing ("crazy" and "amazing") thing. Every so often when I start to feel like I’ve got a handle on what it all means, it is only precisely then—and not a moment sooner—that “Alex” (aka GirlyBoy) reminds us of his color/… Read full post »

Have you ever been gobsmacked by gratitude? You know, one of those moments when the lightbulb appears over your head and some kind of smoke screen clears and you suddenly take stock of everything wonderful that exists in your life? The kind of realization that brings you to your unreligious knees,… Read full post »

In response to the latest in the case of the 4 year old who was suspended for having hair covering his ears (yes, this is in OUR country!)...

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/13/education/13hair.html?scp=1&sq=James%20C.%20McKinley%20Jr.%20A%20suburgan%20Dallas%20school&st=cse> Link to a… Read full post »