Evan Exempt's Blog

Evan Exempt's Fortune Cookie Wisdom

Surly young man makes a sham of wisdom, philosophy, and haiku.

Evan Exempt

Location: Columbia, Missouri, USA
Birthday: July 18

Bio: "I am going to keep this short...." exemptfromfortune.blogspot.com

MY RECENT POSTS

Haiku #34
January 11, 2011 10:18AM
Haiku #33
November 06, 2010 02:14PM
Haiku #32
July 23, 2010 06:04AM
Fortune Cookie Wisdom #57
July 21, 2010 12:41PM
Fortune Cookie Wisdom #56
June 01, 2010 10:41PM

MY RECENT COMMENTS

“And yeah, it's 5-7-7. I am experimenting with new styles. F**k off.”
November 06, 2010 02:32PM
“Emo haiku attempt fail...”
November 06, 2010 02:15PM
“They get pretty soggy.”
December 29, 2009 03:41PM
“I was going to make a joke about how I was writing this blog comment while drivin…”
August 27, 2009 05:48PM
“Thanks, john. People generally get on here and tell me I suck and that my haiku…”
August 17, 2009 05:47PM

Evan Exempt's Links

Salon.com

JANUARY 11, 2011 10:18AM

A lovely morning
For granted did I take it
Now a witch's tit

(I wrote this the other morning, but didn't get around to posting it until today. This whole day has actually been a witch's tit.)

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NOVEMBER 6, 2010 2:14PM

Haiku #33

The fires are out
Dead leaves tremble in the wind
And I am alone again

2 Comments

JULY 23, 2010 6:04AM

Haiku #32

Tattered flag flying

Honor is her metaphor

A bent pole for you

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JULY 21, 2010 12:41PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #57

Winning is easy when your goal is to lose.

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JUNE 1, 2010 10:41PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #56

It is better to be the sort of man who drinks a twelve-pack before he goes to bed than it is to be the sort of man who drinks a six-pack when he gets up in the morning.

2 Comments

MAY 25, 2010 1:45PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #55

It is never as much fun to meet halfway with someone you know well than it is to go all the way with someone you just met.

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MAY 25, 2010 1:44PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #54

A whore dreads silence for fear of hearing the echoes of all that he/she has uttered.

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APRIL 9, 2010 1:30PM

Haiku #31

Home after a date
Reflecting in the mirror
A grand booger hangs

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FEBRUARY 23, 2010 10:10AM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #53

Everything you own is possessed.

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JANUARY 25, 2010 10:55PM

Haiku #30

On the next treadmill –
glistens she, The Queen of Hearts
You hold in your farts Read full post »

1 Comments

JANUARY 24, 2010 11:14PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #52

It is better to be full of oneself than full of shit.

2 Comments

JANUARY 23, 2010 12:44AM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #51

The party does not start until you leave.

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JANUARY 12, 2010 8:49PM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #50

You can die, or you can live trying.

2 Comments

DECEMBER 28, 2009 1:26AM

Fortune Cookie Wisdom #49

Greek culture may have stood the test of time, but a leftover Greek salad will not.

(You see, Asian restaurants can make more money by serving fortune cookies that mock their competition. Yeah, it's a stretch, but bear with me.)

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3 Comments

DECEMBER 15, 2009 3:54PM