I've washed my hair and cleaned the bathroom. Cleaned the kitchen a bit, too. It still feels too early for dinner, so, here I am, filling time and my computer screen with letters, like little ants marching in a line. This is the last of my EIGHT long nights alone. Lady Lucia and I will be reunited in about 22 1/2 hours. I've been counting since we reached the 100 hour mark. I guess I seem pathetic but this week has really been rough, even though I've done everything possible to "make lemonade from life's lemons" and use the solitude productively (writing, meditating, etc). Still...enough already! I want my Lady Lucia back. Alice and Trixie do, too.

The funeral for Lady L's mother was on Friday. Her Florida cousin (and the cousin's adult children) were there, along with some of her mother's co-workers and customers from the beauty salon where she'd worked as a receptionist. Lady Lucia said the funeral was "good but exhausting," especially because she was the Primary Mourner (as she told me on the 'phone) for the first time in her life. The Primary Mourner, she said, is expected to keep it together and make things run smoothly for everyone else. That's a tiring role to play.

There will be a memorial service on Long Island, for her mother's New York area relatives (of which there are more than the Florida handful) probably some time in early June. I will, of course, be by Lady Lucia's side for that service, as I wished, so much, that I could have been for this week's. (She will make sure it's held on a weekend so that neither I nor anyone else will have to ask for time off from work in order to attend it).

My friend Hippolyta, who is not a member of OS but who reads this blog regularly, said that she was surprised to read (in my last "Wedding and Funeral" post) that I was not out (of the closet) at my current job. She'd assumed that I was. One of my other ministry colleagues also expressed surprise at learning that fact, saying, "I'd just assumed you were out everywhere!" SIGH. I know it stinks that I'm closeted at this job. I hadn't realized, when I first took it, that I would need to be, but that became clear quickly enough. When same-sex marriage first became legal here (last Summer) I heard so many of the residents (as well as some workers) at the Home comment that it was "disgusting!" If I hadn't realized, before, that I'd best keep the nature of my personal life secret, it would have been obvious then. Anyway, never again! And I do hope and pray for another job soon, which will be better not just in terms of money but also the workplace culture.  It's time for this regressive crap to be OVER.

I guess, maybe, it's late enough to start heating up my dinner now. 22 hours...

Blessings and well-wishes, with thanks for your virtual company!

Eva T.