The Thing From Bloggy Swamp
Con Chapman
- Location
- Boston, Massachusetts, US of A
- Birthday
- September 28
- Bio
- . . . is a frequent contributor to The Boston Herald, Cronk News, Fictionique and Punchnel's.
MY RECENT POSTS
- Pink Tights, Tu-tus, and
Schmaltzy Music
May 18, 2013 11:43AM - The Maximum Security Book
Group
May 17, 2013 09:34AM - The Battle to Become the Next
Karen Carpenter
May 16, 2013 09:59PM - Big Kitty & Baby Cat
May 16, 2013 08:20AM - I Love Croutons
May 15, 2013 09:13PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “That's almost as bad as
the woman in one of my wife's
former
groups who would
dis…”
May 17, 2013 02:49PM - “Drinking wine and riding
a bike--two of my
favorite
activities but I
think I prob…”
May 17, 2013 10:21AM - “There's a floating
women's poker game at my law
firm, which
may be the
exception…”
May 17, 2013 09:27AM - “*rim shot*”
May 17, 2013 05:26AM - “Well if you're not going
to harm any anchormen, what's
the
point?”
May 16, 2013 02:09PM
Con Chapman's Links
- MY LINKS
- Amazon's Con Chapman Page
- conchapman.com
Pink Tights, Tu-tus, and Schmaltzy Music
(With apologies to Joe and Rose Lee Maphis even though they don’t need ‘em ‘cause they’re already dead.)
Pink tights, tu-tus and schmal-tzy music
Is the only kind of life you’ll ever understand.
Pink tights, tu-tus and schmal-tzy music
You’ll never make a wife to a/… Read full post »
The Maximum Security Book Group
The Battle to Become the Next Karen Carpenter
Is Rumer, the Anglo-Pakistani chanteuse with a retro-pop heart, the new Karen Carpenter?… Read full post »
Big Kitty & Baby Cat
I grew up with a cat whose name was Big Kitty,
the ruler with terror of our provincial city.
Part Tugboat Annie, part Calamity Jane,
her main purpose in life was the infliction of
pain.
She lived with us and her spinster daughter,
a kitten no one took, much… Read full post »
I Love Croutons
I love croutons, I really really do.
I like them in soup, and I like them in stew.
I like it when they strike my palate
after having been sprinkled upon a salad.
But croutons, I’m told, have bad carbohydrates
Which, when ingested, tend to migrate
to stomachs and… Read full post »
Kinda Wish Foundation Brings Aid to Ailing Teenage Boys
COLUMBUS, Ohio. Verrill Barnes is a busy tattoo artist in this bustling Midwestern city, and his calendar is booked solid for the next six weeks. “I’m making money hand over fist,” he says soberly, “but I’m making time this afternoon to give something back.”
As Value of BA Declines, Some Ask if 6th Grade is Worth It
A Day in the Life of a Supermodel Armpit Makeup Artist
The Boston Herald
It was 6:30 a.m., and my CD player-alarm clock sounded the opening notes of… Read full post »
Jack Garner, Parsley Farmer
Jack Garner gazed out over the farm that had been in his family for three generations and gave out a sigh of exasperation. He looked down the rows of curly leaf parsley, often used as a garnish, and thought back to the lessons he had learned bouncing on his father’s
… Read full post »As Anti-Vegan Bias Spreads, Salad Shooters Fight Back
BROOKLINE, Mass. This overwhelmingly liberal community is situated just west of Boston’s Kenmore Square, a proximity that sometimes makes for uncomfortable encounters between drunken sports fans and nightclub habitues to the east and more pacific diners from Brookline’s many vegeta
… Read full post »Cuteness vs. Astuteness
If I had to choose between a face full of cuteness
and what Veblen called the physiognomy of astuteness
I’d opt in a minute for the upraised eyebrow
arching hairwards as high as the eye goes.
A woman endowed with a skeptical look
is an enigmatic and inscrutable thing
while the… Read full post »
College Athletes Give Back by Going Back to School
Your Bug Advisor
There are between six and ten million species of insects, but only one for humans. Hardly seems like a fair fight, which is why you need Your Bug Advisor on your side!
Dear Bug Advisor:
I have carpenter bees–I don’t mean me personally, I mean my house.&n
… Read full post »You Are What Your iPod Says You Are
Despite the advances that the self-esteem movement has made, most people know in their hearts that what counts is not how they feel about themselves, but what they actually accomplish in the real world. Or as two-time Super Bowl-winning coach Bill Parcells succinctly put it, “You ar
… Read full post »Feminist Gift Shopping is Man's Work
Rescue Dudes Find Shelter in Arms of Less Intense Women
SOMERVILLE, Mass. Eli Tucker is a twenty-eight year old man with above-average looks and a good job, but his self-esteem barely registers on the Kinsdorph-Eisenstat Personality Index. “Eli bears the scars of an abusive relationship,” says Tom Selfkirk, executive director… Read full post »
Intensive Seminar Helps Cat Poets Sharpen Claws
BECKET, Mass. This sleepy western Massachusetts town is home to St. Judith College, the only institution of higher learning in the world named after the patron saint of cats, but that’s not the explanation for the high number of cat lovers here this weekend. “I have learned so much… Read full post »
Sense About Scents!
Scientists tell us that scent is the strongest link to memory: who can forget French writer Marcel Proust and his little madeleines? Of course you can’t forget it if you never read Proust, which you probably haven’t, in which case just think for a moment how your brother-in-law Gene smel… Read full post »
The Last Game
Don’t come ’round here looking for the fresh, clean, family-friendly content this site is known for this afternoon. I’m taking off at 3:30 to watch my kid pitch what may be the final start of his high school career. He will take the mound today with a 3-0 record… Read full post »
On Being Hailed by One's Former Head Cheerleader
(a poem whose title alone is longer than a haiku)
On Boston Common, one fine Sabbath
A horrid sound heard I;
It caused all but the stony deaf
To turn their heads to spy
From whence it came, and why.
And only I could answer that… Read full post »
High Stakes Transform Innocent World of Spelling Bees
SEDALIA, Mo. It’s the final round of the third-grade spelling bee at Sacred Heart Elementary School in this small Midwestern town, and you could cut the tension in the school’s gymnasium with a wooden ice cream spoon.
&n… Read full post »
It was May of my senior year in college. Everybody was coasting, knowing either what they were going to be doing the next year, or that they’d be doing nothing. Except for one guy, Tom.
Tom had been accepted at medical school–Harvard, no less–so his future
… Read full post »Che vs. Fidel: A Mulligan for the Maximum Leader
Yankees Release Billy Crystal, Sign Eddie Murphy
&nb… Read full post »
Don Rich
Ken Honeywell
noah tawls
littlewillie
Damon E Walters
Matt Paust
Salon.com
