Editor’s Pick
NOVEMBER 22, 2010 7:08PM

Thanksgiving Alone

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I could do Thanksgiving alone. Lots of people do that.

 Hanging up the phone, I could barely remember why she cancelled. Something about “needing space.” But I was already getting ready to be a frozen turkey dinner tough guy. Remembering, from experience, that a shirttail doesn’t work when you pull the hot tin tray from the oven.

 

There really wasn’t anyone to call. It was Wednesday. Thanksgiving was tomorrow. I had already begged off on invitations from my two aunts because I had expected an out of town guest. And it wasn’t like I had a phone book full of friends to call. Or even a scrap from the corner of a phone book page.

 

This was back when people used phone books. A different time. Back when Chicago was a grid of streets and alleys colored only in history and shades of gray. Especially in the slippery shadow winds of November. Not like today when rainbow flowers spill out of the dividers between lanes of traffic and thousands upon thousands of trees have been planted.

 

Back then. The very late 1970’s. Chicago was no longer the brooding black, railroad cross road muscle of manufacturing soot. The air had lightened to gray. There was a woman Mayor. A tough Irish lady named Jane Byrne had electrified the city by actually winning. Instead of stacking the souls of poor people straight up into the sky in housing projects, she was going to go spend a week in a project. Cabrini Green. Just over the line that marked where I felt safe to walk. I didn’t know what I thought about her moving in to Cabrini Green for a week or however long it was.  But I knew it was different. There was a sense that something was just about to happen in Chicago.

 

Late that Wednesday afternoon before Thanksgiving, more than anything the city felt deserted. As if all the people had somehow been sucked into airplanes, like the one she would not be on, and blown out to Grandmother’s houses over a million different rivers and woods.

 

Best way to make sure I was ready for my coming Thanksgiving alone was to go for a walk. Having come from a family of walkers, I pretty much believed that going for walk was the way one got ready for anything.

 

So in the early grey glowing twilight long ago, I set out into the empty streets and sidewalks, rounding first the school where I was a special education teacher. It had only been a few hours since we had closed up the education shop early. But people need touchstones when they walk and back then the school was mine. The school was one of the beating hearts of a neighborhood called Uptown. Back then, there were also streets in that neighborhood that were best not walked by all. But I had learned those streets trailing the guy who had hired me to be a teacher. His name was Pat. He started the school up in the late sixties himself. He started it as what was then called a “Free School.” But as the neighborhood and the needs changed over the years, it became a special ed school. The thing I loved about a classroom of 25 kids, teaching all subjects, was that in special ed it was all about the kid first---and not the subject. So if a kid started bouncing a basketball in the middle of social studies, I could coax the dribbler into a game of catch and then lead us all back to social studies as the ball flew back and forth. I didn’t have to worry so much about rules.

 

Most important was that school didn’t end at the walls of the classroom. Sometimes when kids didn’t or couldn’t show up in the morning, I’d follow Pat east on Montrose Avenue, turn left at Beacon, run to the back of a building while Pat started ringing doorbells. And then as the kids came rushing out the back door, I’d corral them and we’d all trudge back to the school.

 

But on that long ago day before Thanksgiving as I walked east on Montrose, crossed Clark Street and looked north into those very same streets, even they seemed somehow deserted. As if a lonely tumbleweed could go blowing through. No sign of any of my kids.

 

Still not dark, I wasn’t yet ready to hole up alone for the holiday in my little yellow kitchen with the round table. So I kept walking towards the lake.

 

When all else fails. Keep walking towards the water.

 

Walking alone would be good practice for being alone. I was still glad I hadn’t attached myself to some gathering or another. The only thing worse than being alone was being alone in a crowd.

 

But I could do Thanksgiving alone. Lots of people do that.

 

There was plenty of beer, football games, food I didn’t know how to cook. Frozen dinners that were no problem. This was back in the time when a person could hum songs with lyrics like, “I have my books, and my poetry to protect me. I am shielded in my armor.” And those were brand new thoughts.

 

Still walking, almost to the Lake, I turned right on inner Lake Shore Drive. And that’s when I saw him.

 

As the last of that grey light was just about to fall, I saw the bright red and white checked shirt, like a walking beacon of light, underneath the open gray raincoat. Walking alone. Just like me.

 

It was Studs Terkel. Of course I knew who it was. Every single person in Chicago would know who it was. I had grown up in a house where Studs Terkel was always on the radio. I had to say something. We were the only people on the street. I had to say something. And besides, even though I had never actually spoken to him, I now actually had a real, honest to goodness connection. I took a deep breath.

 

“Good afternoon or evening Mr. Terkel.”

 

“Well good afternoon young fella. What brings you out on to these streets today?”

 

“Oh just walking.” I told him my name and said. “I’m a teacher. I work at the Southern School. Pat hired me. I saw you come in once for a Board Meeting, but we never met.”

 

“Ah a teacher!” he smiled in the deep warm gravel of a voice I had only heard on the radio. And if Pat hired you, you must also be a good teacher. Pat’s in my book “Working” you know.”

 

“Yes sir. I know. My copy of the book is very well read. And thank you sir. I guess I’m learning. Schools over for the holiday now. Kind of empty out here.”

 

“Ah,” said Studs Terkel. “Empty? No. Keep listening. It’s not empty at all. Especially for a young teacher. You just keep listening young man. You just keep listening.”

 

The exchange took 5 seconds. It was more years ago than I care to count.

 

But I can tell you that even after all these years I still remember how good that frozen turkey dinner tasted.

 

And how not for one moment that Thanksgiving did I feel alone.

 

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Comments

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Wow. I was so there. Wow. You are truly a storyteller par excellance.
OMG, thank you for Studs...who as a mentor of mine back when and for whom I posted some of the things I posted today...especially the Fats Waller, whom he adored more than any other. He was the soul of Chicago...and, with Ebert, one of my guardian angels back when I was just a ghetto kid learning the reporter game a step at a time...

Love ya', Studs...forever...
So good to see you Chicago Guy....how I have missed your stories. This is just breathtaking...xox
What a story! Excellent. Thank you for sharing it.
Beautiful!
Chicago, I love you for this.
You. Write. Par excellent.
Loved this here Roger.
Your words touch me.
Thanks for this.....
Agree with Sally. Wow is my first reaction. Studs was also an amazing storyteller, just like you. RRRR
Roger.... sorry... but I just kissed you. Thanks!!! About those same years... I taught Upward Bound at Purdue Cal in Hammond.... and often took the orange cars of the South Shore into Chicago..... hey.... we did GOOD!!!!!
a story from chicago guy with a sentence like "As if all the people had somehow been sucked into airplanes, like the one she would not be on, and blown out to Grandmother’s houses over a million different rivers and woods," some paul simon lyrics, studs terkel and a frozen TV turkey dinner, that's enough to make me perfectly happy. yum.
It's impossible to feel alone when reading a story like this, written by you.... Wonderful.
This was great, thank you. I missed your writing, I didn't realize you were back. I read you a lot last year but I rarely spoke, I hope to read more from you.
Roger, that's a superb Thanksgiving story! How cool to have just the two of you walking on the street. I was in college when "Working" was published and he was a well known name on campus back in those days.
Whoa !!! YOu are freaking TALENTED !!!!
What a tale!!!

r --
It's so great to read a post that a story worth reading. Thank you! There were several years that to the outside world it looked like I spent Thanksgiving alone, and for many of them, I thought I was alone. But this year it struck me looking back that there had always been some special connection on each Thanksgiving, and I really never was alone. A small connection can make a big difference. The right frame of heart and mind makes an even bigger difference.
This masterful story is truly told. Gotta love those connections that pop up when least expected and most needed.
delightful story--thank you chgo guy
Sally, Robin, C, Steph, Mission, Bernadine,Femme, L'Heure,
JD, Scarlett, Caroline--Thank you and Happy Thanksgiving!

Designator--I loved "Working" too.

Keka--those were pretty impressive mentors you had!

FTM--I remember Upward Bound well---I worked for Urban
Gateways in the summers.

Cartouche---that was the goal. Thanks for seeing that.
Holi---exactly. The whole thing took 20 seconds tops and it made all the difference in the world.
Amazing what can happen when you walk down to the lake. =o) Along with Pete Seeger, the world needs more people like Studs Terkel.
And Molly Ivins. I've missed her so much, this month. Thank goodness we had her, if only for a short time.

And it's good to see you back on Open Salon, Roger.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Happy Thanksgiving Shiral!
I love Studs and I love the way you told this story. Thank you!
Jane had balls. I bet Studs would have liked this story. I do.
Damon--One of the nicest compliments I ever received in my life was when a person who really knew Studs--she was like a daughter to him--told me that he would have liked a tribute I once wrote to him. I am very thankful to know several people who did know him well. Thanks for reminding me of that. And yes Jane did!

mgminm and Roy---Happy Thanksgiving!

Dolly--Coming from you, that is a compliment.
"When all else fails. Keep walking towards the water." AMEN! But you had me at "I could do Thanksgiving alone". What a great story! You write so vividly I am always transported in time and space. Thank you!!
What a fantastic interlude with a literary great and I admired the vivid if dark descriptions of Chicago--a city I love! This was just wonderful.
A special day to have the honor of being on the cover with you, (even if they have me baking my frybread...)

Whenever I think about leaving OS, I remember that I might miss you coming by and leaving such gems.
As I sit here in Wausau, it's nice to read something that brings me back home.
I lived~resided?~all over Chicagoland from 1939-the early 60's and again in 1989.
I still love it and visit not frequently enough.
Go Bears!!
Steph--I've already read your piece on the cover twice. It's like a soul meal. Thanks for that!

Maryway---Thanks. After 20 years of planting trees and flowers, Chicago is no longer quite so dark. Most days.

XJS--A Bears fan from Wisconsin. Cool! Don't worry I won't tell.

JGAH?--Transported me too.
finally found that place to post a comment. I was born in Chicago but left as a two year old. all my memories of thanksgiving are of Los Angeles so it is hard to identify with the rest of you in general but I do remember the year I had one of those frozen turkey dinners and I have to differ with you studs, that was the WORST part of being alone on T-day.

today I got a call from my son who lives in British Columbia and the reception was so bad he had to write an e-mail instead. That was a good part since he likes to write and types fast and it went on for a while.

as for walking, not anymore since aage and arthritise deny that particular pleasure, but it is nice to know that I have company in the aloneness section of HOLIDAY-ITIS. I'm not too fond of Xmas either since that is also dependent on memory for celebration.

However, there are all of you folks who chose to comment and to you I hope there is comfort in your memories and even a phone call or two. HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL. and to all a good night.
oops wrong holiday.
Tell us another one --
What a wonderful Thanksgiving gift - to share words with Studs himself. Thanks for sharing this story.
great story! Could a story with Studs be anything else? :) What a fabulous memory.
great story! Could a story with Studs be anything else? :) What a fabulous memory.
That's the wonderful thing about Chicago. I had a person to person run in with Mike Royko. You can do that in Chicago. r
ONL---that's a really interesting point, that you can run into anybody in Chicago. I think that's almost in the DNA of the place, going back to it being a crossroads. And it's people like Studs who make themselves so accessible. Harry carry was like that too. He's stop and talk to anybody on the street.

Claire---Am honored that this was the place.

Irishpie--I know people who actually did know him well (as opposed to my street corner encounter) and from what I've heard, the stories are pretty good!

Anne and bondwoman--thanks for the read!
I didn't have the honor of meeting Studs before he died, but I have met Greg Kot of the Tribune and Sound Opinions (NPR, 91.5 FM) fame; he is my favorite Chicago writer...after Roger Wright, of course. Now, talk about a flashback to 1979! As you know, my father was still City Hall's Budget Director under Jane Byrne back then, while the Catholic church was first instilling fear in me and chipping away at my self-esteem. Ah, the memories of youth.
Paul Haider, Chicago

P.S. I am thankful for... good writers!
This is a wonderful story. And you are an amazing storyteller.~r
Great story woven seemlessly together. Loved it.
Terrific; gives me shivers, the good kind.
"The only thing worse than being alone, was being alone in a crowd."

That's one prolific line, my friend. Love this post more than I can say.

Coming from a large raucous family, it's hard for me to imagine being alone on Thanksgiving. You make it sound like poetry and privilege.

Great to read you, Roger.
Wonderful story and love your writing style.
Joan---Many thanks!
Ischoopie and Lois--I appreciate that.
dirndl--Next comes the bad kind of shivers. . .yikes! I just scared myself!
Cathy!!!!!
Paul--You left out the part you'd like the most---Studs (and I know this from reading---not from my 20 second encounter) was an agnostic. . .
wow. this took me right back to my days living in chicago at the lincoln park hotel. i was kinda young then too!
mayor burne came in and put her name up everywhere. i remember the ride one day from the airport to downtown and i must have seen her name at least 30 times!
and that was when chicago-fest was REALLY chicago fest!
i miss chicago, but not enough to face the winters as an old(er) lady.
NC does right by me, but oh how much fun i had in chicago, back in 'my' day!
thanks for the stroll down memory lane and how awesome you meeting studs terkel right at the absolute best moment for you!
Great story! Back then I wasn't much of anything yet, but studying "Working" in an American Studies class gave me some insight into the potential for loving what one does for a living and that was a lifelong gift to millions thanks to the great Studs Terkel. What a privilege for you to have this story as one of your own!
What a great treat to come upon this little gem of a Thanksgiving story! Not only could I envision the chilly, windy, deserted streets, I could FEEL them. And I could empathize with the sense of depressed loneliness followed by the complete, Studs induced lack thereof.
tulips--I knew that hotel well. Actually had a garden right down the block. ANd yes, the original Chicago Fests were just mind blowing. There are still Muddy Waters clips on you tube from there.

Susann---Privilege is exactly what it was.

Procopius! And to think he did all that in about 20 seconds!
I love your writing so. I could sing these words: they are poetry. This is one of the best things you've written, Roger. Just f'in perfect.