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Brie aka Barbara K

Brie aka Barbara K
Western NY, USA
January 24
I am a Daughter, Sister, Wife, Mother, Aunt, Cousin, Friend, Neighbor, .....and many other things.. I'm searching for continued enlightenment...


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AUGUST 20, 2009 1:24AM

For Jeanne - Please give me a death panel.

Rate: 9 Flag

 My lovely mother in law suffered a stroke 5 years ago. Although, she is conscious and able to sit in a wheelchair, she can't speak, eat without a feeding tube, or recognize her loved ones. Her body is skeletal,  her eyes swollen and empty and she wears a diaper. 

Although, she is fortunate to be in a adequate private facility, her existence is a living hell.


After caring for her older brother who was an alzheimers patient and living in a nursing home, she stated to me that she would rather be shot than live under those conditions. She was horrified.  I was horrified by her statement.

Live and learn.


Its been 5 years and she remains incarcerated in both mind and body.
She is awakened every morning, fed then dressed and placed in her wheel chair. There she sits staring blankly into the abyss. She can't interact with anyone.

People cringe and throw the word euthanasia around as a political issue. It should be a humane issue.

Truth be told, there should be a death panel available to free this lovely lady from the hell that she is living in.

It's the human thing to do.


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Oh, Brie this is so sad. What a heavy burden you bear. I see these people at my mother's care home and it just tears me apart. I hope someone would be kind enough to put me out of my misery if I got like that. I mean, we do it for animals!
Emma, Her existence right now is a horror. She is a dignified woman. This is a sin.
Ach. It’s so sad to hear this. I agree with you about it being a sin – and it’s a disgrace to humanity that our society isn’t brave enough to confront basic issues of life and death.
A living will, simple. But not so simple, as in the Terry Shaivo incident. When politics get in front of patient care, politics usually wins!! I don't know if a LW would help here, but it couldn't have hurt.

Great post, Brie~~
David, Well put. It is a disgrace in every sense of the word.

Scanner, Thank you.
Very tragic; the pompous pundits who bleat "slippery slope" don't do this subject, or the people involved, any kind of justice.
Scoubidou - Indeed. Thanks for commenting.
My great grandmother "lived" this way for a very long time, although she had what was then described as dementia...I know it broke my grandmother's heart as well as the pocket books of her and her three sisters. I remember visiting my great grandmother and can still picture her these so many years was no way to "live".
My mother-in-law was a terrific woman, too. It's so hard to see these people we have been able to lean on become so helpless. Worse yet, when they are suffering before our eyes.
Hazel and Barbara, Thank you for commenting. There are so many people living like this. It's tragic.

Just recently, a house was built in our town that is over 11,000 square feet. The owner is a man who owns 8 nursing homes in our region.

What's wrong with this picture?
Thank you Brie for your following, advice and suggestions on my travel to the NY Times!
This is such a sad and difficult issue. I feel like I won't know how I will feel in her situation till I'm there. I can't imagine.
Sorry for being so late acknowledging your comments. Thanks Kathy, and Caroline let's hope you're never in her situation.