I mean really really look at them. You can see the horns if you are looking at the picture just right. You have to squint, and look at it out of the corner of your eye, kind of like one of those 3d poster things that never work when you are at the mall but the second your teacher hangs on on the wall in the classroom you see more than just the damn sailboat bc youre so bored staring at the damn thing for 45 mins at a time 5 days a week.
This is one of the more recent pictures I have of the 4 of them together, its from christmas, they are all showing off their new Pjs that they got from great grandma betty. Sabryn (9 on 8/30) Kailynne (6 on 9/2) Adrianna (5 on 8/14) Isabella (6 on 10/2) are my most treasured thing(s), which is what todays picture is.
They drive me crazy, like Miss Sabryns temper tantrums and pretween angst screaming about how we are no fun and math homework is too hard and we are mean. Like Miss Kailynnes ditzy attitude where one minute Im fighting for her attention because shes found something shiney then the next minute shes activng just like her father. Like Miss Adriannas annoyingly endearing way of clinging to me because she doesnt get the love and attention of a mother from her own mom, Im guessing, but her way of showing affection is by head butting and yanking on my arms. Like Miss Isabella who is too much like her mother and goes out of her way to try and play her father against me. They piss me off all the time, ALL the time! But I wouldnt know what to do if any of them were gone.
Im annoyed by the fact that their mom is being a total bitch and making Isabella go to school where she lives. I understand all about the laws that make it right for her to do this because she is the custodial parents, but you would think the law would open their eyes and see that the girls live with us 90% of the time there should be no reason why they couldnt go to school where we live. Instead Aarons going to end up losing his visitation with them and have to switch to weekends only. Which is what she has now, when she has them. More often than not they still spend most of their time with her with out her because she pawns them off on her brother and mom.
As much as they make me mad and I want to scream at them and thow away all their toys and crap they think is so special but not worth shit, I dont want to see them have to go live with that waste of a woman. They are my daughters as much as Kailynne and Sabryn are. People ask me if they are tripplets when we go out in public, I dont see it, but then again if you are just glancing at them as they run past, first I dont see how you've missed the horns, they show up best when the demons are running past and all blurry, if you are just glancing at them I guess I could see similarities.
Aaron had the nerve to tell me one day that If something happened to Izzy and Adri then he wouldnt know what would happen to him, or if I would be enough to keep him sane. I understand that but I dont think he gets that with out the girls I would be a mess too. And it wouldnt matter if it was my girls his girls one of mine one of his whatever. It wouldnt matter at all which were gone we both would need each other. I wouldnt expect him to have my children as replacements for his girl or vice versa but I would expect him to still love me and them and the other way around.
We arent going to think about those what ifs for now. What ifs make me a miserable person because I usually end up sad or pissed off which makes Aaron pissed of because Im sure i take it out on him.