Yeah. I know. It's been awhile.

I SWEAR I've been doing much more than feeling sorry for myself. But, seeing as how it's an anniversary and all, I have to do the obligatory post. Give me a week and I'll post other links to what I've been doing. Promise.

(Also, apparently,… Read full post »

(Or, how I've spent my time while on an unintentional hiatus.)

Well shit. It's been a while, hasn't it? Life took a turn for the surreal and I feel like I'm finally getting my land-legs back. In no particular order, this is what the past year has been like in my world:… Read full post »

(Or, Oh, the Joys of Online Dating!)

Off and on since the mid-to-late 90’s, I have been a fan of getting to know people online, either through message boards, chat services, or more recently, online dating. There is just something about the game of it all – trying to create a face… Read full post »

In every TV show
And in every movie
Someone …

Somehow …

Got to say goodbye.

The audience
Was able to bury their ghosts.
Even if it was through a snowglobe.

Shaking the reality into a dream
Allowing  their pent up fears to be expelled
Through a released breath.

But I …

I?

Never got to sha… Read full post »

I want to laugh.
Unabashedly.
(Just 'cuz I amuse myself.)

("Don't smirk at me like that", I think.)

I want to smile.
For no reason.
(Just 'cuz it amuses others.)

("Don't laugh at me like that", I think.)

I want to sing.
Loudly, and off key.
(Just 'cuz… Read full post »

Drip, drip, drip.
I hear it, once again.

In each falling drop.
It is felt.

“Listen to the rhythm of the falling rain …”

Drip, drip, drip.
Pitter-patter, pitter-patter.

Drip, plop. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Plop, drip.
______________________________

“ … let me be… Read full post »

Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight …

I don’t remember who first taught me that nursery rhyme, but it is one of the few I still carry, and hold dear to my heart, to this very day. Over three decades later I STILL wish upon the first star…

Read full post »

FUCK! I just spent an hour writing up my re-cap of the past decade and, thanks to my ADD fingers, I lost it. All of it. (Grrr.) So, here I go in hopes of trying to recreate the last 60 minutes of my life.
________________________________

Many of my friends are wishing 2009 a… Read full post »

I haven't been writing much. Not because I don't want to, but it seems that my brain is in overdrive lately and it feels like I can't.

Work has been (and continues to be) insanely busy. This is a Good Thing (TM), but it is draining. Combine this with the insanity… Read full post »

SCREW CANADA!

(And I mean that in the nicest possible way. Eh?)

Tonight I was watching the first part of the season finale of “So You Think You Can Dance” (the US version) (hereinafter known as SYTYCD – US); however, before my 8:00 PM (Pacific) start time, I was whiling away… Read full post »

This last week felt like a month of Mondays; not Sundays, Mondays. So, since I am out of new books to read, I looked for escape online (the internet isn’t just for porn after all). Instead of my usual blither blather, I am sharing some old and some new TED links./… Read full post »

I thought that this year would be the year that I would finally escape my mind (and depression) as it relates to the holidays. No such luck. Tonight I was chatting with Tanya, and as we were talking I realized that I missed Mom. (We were doing the stereotypical *squee! ZOMG*… Read full post »

So, in December of 2008 my maternal uncle was back in the pokey. Now that I look back I realize that the only time he intentionally reaches out to me is when he is locked up. Hmm. Food for thought, no?

Even though he IS blood there are times, more often… Read full post »

You terrify me.
(Please don't break my heart.)

There is so much more I could show you; that I could give you.
(Please don't break my heart.)

But ...
... I am afraid.

Afraid of showing that much to you. Of giving that much to you. I want… Read full post »

In lieu of real content, I leave you with an IM conversation that happened just now. (Hey, I don't have to be all emo-writer all the time, right? Er, write?)

me: I think my cat just tried to make out with me

Tanya: wtf?

me: I… Read full post »

Sometimes the now leads you to appreciate quotes like this …

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be… Read full post »

Wednesday night last I found myself at The Knitting Factory in Hollyweird, CA, invited there by an old friend to shoot a show with her.

The line up was: The Black Widows, The Pack A.D., and Nomeansno. All three bands were amazing, but TPA and No stole the show.

In lieu of… Read full post »

So, there I sat. Watching, and catching, fireflies in my hand. And there you sat.

As I opened my fist to watch that glowing insect flitter about, I saw you doing the same; our faces lit with luminescence and awe. 

"These lips? They are ours."

Yes.

Yes.

Yes! I found out that you ARE real.… Read full post »

It seems that since I first had to deal with an alarm clock, the last few decades years months weeks days I’ve been mentally sleeping and hitting the snooze button more often than is healthy.

And, yes, I have had a love/hate with waking up since pre-school …

..… Read full post »

I know that turning 40 freaked you the fuck out. I know this, you know this.

But? You handled it with grace, and aplomb. Over the weekend you gathered to your heart your nearest and dearest, and we were able to celebrate you, WITH you.

And that?

Was your gift, to US.

You are… Read full post »

(Although this started out as an explanation to one particular person, it turned into a plea into my friends; we are all human here. See the question at the very end.)

Through most of my dating and relationship life, I've had my fair share of pet names. They have spanned… Read full post »

So, meanwhile, over on my Facebook, I've been posting some quotes that struck me. I'm sharing them now with you, my OS family.

On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so… Read full post »

Here I sit, physically still, mentally zooming. So much of this static is not something I can write about because …

… because.

There are parts that I can share, make public. Yet …

… I don’t.

But maybe not in the same way you felt it.

I was raised Catholic. (VERY Catholic. Very IRISH CATHOLIC (TM).) We had more photos of the Pope on our walls than we did family photos. And we had even more of the Kennedy's. So ... I was raised with a healthy… Read full post »