I spent last week in the countryside with my extended family, doing something as close to camping as it will ever get for us.
And it’s not really close to camping at all: vacationing in a rented Tuscan villa lost in the mountains about an hour’s drive from Florence. The villa was gorgeous, the view breathtaking. There was a private pool, state-of-the-art kitchen, and a multitude of comfortable bedrooms and full bathrooms. But the very limited internet connectivity, bad cell phone reception, remoteness from a grocery store, well-water (undrinkable for several of us, including an aunt on immuno-suppressants due to a kidney transplant, two very young children, and two people with gastro-intestinal issues (including me, who still managed to get a mild case of food poisoning elsewhere)), and lack of a clothes dryer and air conditioning made it pretty rustic for my comfort-, convenience-, and cool-air- obsessed, staunchly urban family. Our Italian ancestors were farmers, but they'd come to America and quickly adapted to a life far from the countryside. This kind of living is no longer in our blood.
Still, while I’d had my trepidations, none of us were overly upset about the lack of our habitual creature comforts – and really, how rotten would we be if we complained when we were in such a lovely place, and all together?
The absence of air conditioning, which my Aunt C. once qualified as “like camping” (even if you live in a Parisian apartment), made us open doors and windows that otherwise probably would have remained closed. Mountain breezes kept us cool during the day. Bugs came in and out as much as we did. Clothing that would have been dried in a dryer, was now tacked up on a line overlooking a plunging view into the valley below. We marveled at how fast the hot Tuscan sun could do the job of a machine – just about as quickly, in fact, if you hung your clothes out in the early afternoon.
As the week went on, we began to get closer to nature. We started to learn the times of day when the cicadas would make their twanging music, which sometimes seemed near-deafening in our isolated temporary home. We no longer needed to check the weather; looking off the mountain, we could see the sky all the way to Florence. Our skin seemed to feel the slightest difference in temperature, so that, while the Tuscan heat remained, we could still say that the end of our stay was a few degrees cooler than the beginning.
One evening as we set the table for dinner outside, I even found myself, arachnophobe that I am, staring up at a nearby spider, finding something charming and relatable in how she seemed to impatiently wind some long-unmoving prey into a neat ball, as ready to eat as we were down below.
As much as I admired and wondered at the cities and villages we visited, I also came to thrill at these connections with the natural world.
And yet, I was easily reminded of why I don't mind living so distantly from nature, why for me, the most truly relaxing setting is an artificial one. Our garden, for example, was full of lovely-smelling lavender whose buds attracted flocks of butterflies in dozens of colors. But that same lavender made my eyes itch and tear, and those butterflies weren’t the only insects attracted to it. Bees and wasps angrily confronted us whenever we passed by their favorite place.
For every butterfly or soft breeze, there were prickly bushes and mosquitoes whose bites made our skin redden and swell up. It was easy to appreciate the thick stone walls that kept our bedroom cool, until, a few days after our arrival, the boyfriend saw a scorpion near our bed. We couldn’t catch it, and so it remained our roommate, the most unnerving kind of roommate I can think of – even more so than the fat black spider that I turned to see sitting on the wall just beside my pillow one night (that incident also made a bad housemate of me; my scream woke up not only the boyfriend – who had to catch the spider and put it outside - but also my Aunt J., who’d been soundly sleeping in the bedroom beside ours).
The sun dried our clothes and made it possible for us to swim and take lovely pictures in the places we visited, but it also burned our skin and took away our energy. The small family of shrews frolicking on the creek banks of the nearest village was adorable to watch; the flies that seemed to be omnipresent gamboled just as energetically, buzzing always in our ears and jumping on our food, our hair, our clothes.
It seems that loving nature is a matter of balance or detachment. In the city or the suburbs, you can remove so many natural inconveniences. It’s an easy life that way. But in the country, you have to accept everything. If you truly love nature, you have to love it all, embrace it all, love - or at least tolerate - the spider and the scorpion and the fly as much as the trees and the birds.
People often point out that nature is cruel. I feel like she's also hard to have a peaceful relationship with. I want to love her completely, but while I know I’ll continue to do whatever I can to preserve and protect her, I’ll never be able to live with her in harmony.
When we got back to our apartment yesterday, I found that whenever I was doing a stationary task, like washing dishes or brushing my teeth, my eyes were involuntarily darting around, searching for spiders or scorpions on the walls. My ears were pricked for the acute hum of a mosquito. I’d realize I no longer needed to do this, and I’d relax.
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Comments
Sounds like pure heaven. Nevertheless, this is a stellar essay on the complexities of all things I can see it being published in a fine travel magazine or just any fine publication. You ain't no Guido, Alysa.
r.
I do think, however, you might be giving the urban choice, even Paris, an unwarranted free pass from having to take the good with the bad. Blaring horns, street crime, unwanted reminders of poverty and suffering in the forms of street people, smog, conflicting aromas/odors, depending on the sensibilities of your olfactory processes.
Every aspect of human existence has yin and yang, I reckon.
Lezlie
(Alysa, I can't get message here on OS-- get an "error page." Will you be in Paris Aug 11? I will. Are you on FB so we can communicate better? Is there some other way?)
it shows how uncivilized life can be even with a villa.... how was the family, did you all get along?
I enjoy reading about the shuar indians of south america/eucador... they are the users of ayuhascua. lots of amazing accounts that show the dichotomy of man/machine/nature related to them.
Actually, sounds like my regular life in the country, only classier - I got the full range of nature, the heat, the lack of cell phone - but I do have internet, so there's that. Currently spending a few days in Montreal and noted that the wide open doors and windows (no AC) resulted in a fly coming in. At home, even (more or less) screened, I have all manner of winged insects and crawling ones too. No scorpions, tho.
As a nature lover, I like to live a little apart
from my lover. Air-con and switch-on heat
vie for my affections :-)
Welcome back to Paris, Alysa. =o)
rated
Rated.
Loved the way you told this. ~r
One of the most comforting night sounds for me (which I don't hear in this part of Brooklyn but do when I spend the night with my friend, Punk Princess, in my old Manhattan neighborhood) is the sound of the subway on the elevated track, rumbling by every ten minutes or so, all night long. When I hear it, I think, "That's my city. It just keeps going. Always there for me..."
SIGH. But, yes, the country can be wonderful. Thanks for those glorious pictures.
I am amazed how similar the views form your villa are to so many places in California.
workstudio – Grazie! It was definitely a nice break from the routine, though I’m very glad to be back.
designanator – Thanks. I definitely have a new appreciation for our ceiling fan and lack of poisonous, potentially deadly bugs! In all seriousness, though, it was a wonderful trip and I’m glad to have been able to take it.
jlsathre – It’s great to know I’m not the only one who feels this way. I’m glad you’ve found ways to be close to nature – but not closer than you want to be!
Jonathan – You’re a brave man!
Anne – Absolutely! I have no regrets about going – it was a wonderful week, and not only was it great to be with my family and to see so many amazing places and works of art, it was also a really unique chance to be so close to nature, and while I didn’t necessarily love that, it was important, I think.
Sheila – Absolutely!
zanelle – I love “sometimes my garden just terrifies me”. That’s one of the reasons I’m glad I don’t have a garden myself, or even houseplants (our cat chews anything green, even lettuce!).
jmac – So true. Those critters are all over the place, and bacteria, well, it’s presence in my gut was much noticed, too: I got what was probably a mild case of food poisoning from something and was housebound for a day. Ugh….
Chicken Maaan – Thanks. I wanted to put a note about the boyfriend and my policy regarding bugs and spiders – I think I might add it. We feel like it’s not their fault that we don’t like them, and so we try to just catch and release, rather than killing them. The boyfriend is all the more admirable because he’s at least a little unnerved by spiders, but he catches them via our spider gun at home, or a glass and paper elsewhere. As for renaming the boyfriend Marcel (an allusion to Marcel Pagnol?), he says he prefers “the boyfriend”. I think the moniker’s grown on him….
Lezlie – Your comment stopped me in my tracks. You have a very, very good point. I think for me the difference is, manmade problems can to some extent be avoided or stopped. It might not be easy, but if you have a lot of crime in your area, for example, you could form a neighborhood watch, buy an alarm system, petition local leaders to do something about it, etc. Bugs and heat and such, on the other hand, you can’t ultimately win out over. But you’re absolutely right: in general, you have to take the good with the bad anywhere you live. Thanks for that very insightful reminder.
Lea – Thanks for reading. As for Paris on the 11th, I’ll probably be here but will know for sure sometime over the next few days; we’re planning a trip to my in-laws’ in early August, and I’m not sure yet how long we’ll be going, when we’re leaving, etc. I don’t have a Facebook account – the best solution may be to contact me via my e-zine, “Beguile” (www.beguilezine.blogspot.com) and we’ll exchange information there. I hope we’ll get too meet in person!
vzn – Thanks for reading and I’m gald you enjoyed this. My family got along really well – we generally do, although of course when you’re doing a big trip like this that involves a lot of planning and organizing and driving, there’s always a few little spats here and there, but nothing major. It was so wonderful to see them! I’ll also check out the Shuar Indians – sounds interesting.
Myriad – I’m glad you don’t have to deal with scorpions or bad internet connection, at least! I do think it’s wonderful that people can live in nature and be more or less comfortable there. I even envy it a bit. I hope you have a wonderful time in Montreal and that the fly isn’t too annoying (the ones in Tuscany were relentless – I’ve never seen such persistent flies before!).
Sparky – Thanks – and you and I seem to be on the same page there!
rita – Thanks. I often feel pressure to act like I’m totally fine with roughing it and with being out in nature; my in-laws love camping and live in the country and my mother-in-law has actually taken umbrage that I once said camping isn’t for me. But I think the minute you see me even trying to have a meal outside, you realize I’m not exaggerating – it’s just not my thing. As for people of a certain age not camping, I guess that puts you guys in the same group as the guidos from “Jersey Shore”, and myself. Welcome to the club! Fist pumps all around!
Shiral – Paintings by you of the Tuscan countryside are something I’d love to see! But I definitely wouldn’t want you to be in very uncomfortable proximity with spiders and scorpions – dilemma…..
Bellwether – Thanks. Yes, the contrast between the beauty and not being at ease within it, really got to me. But I do promise I had a great time overall and feel so fortunate to have been able to do a trip like this.
hyblaean julie – Thanks for reading. I don’t know if it was the best of both worlds…but thinking about it a bit, maybe you’re right….I mean, I got to experience nature in a way that was at least remotely comfortable – at least I had toilets for one thing – hmm….Thanks for giving me something to ponder.
Gerald – Thanks. The boyfriend and I always try to remove bugs and spiders (and mice), rather than killing them. It’s not their fault that we’re afraid of them, after all. They’re just doing their thing. What’s hard about it is when it comes to things like ticks and head lice and fleas and such – those bugs have to be killed, unfortunately, but I guess they’re also directly harming us and not leaving us an option. As for the dryer, I think you’re right – we even saw clotheslines out in some of the busiest streets of Florence and Siena.
Alan – Thanks. You’re right – it’s so cool that in Europe, with just a short flight or a longer drive or train ride, you can be in a totally different place, pretty easily. One of the perks indeed. I’ll try to remember that when it gets hot here and I have to deal with not having air conditioning. :- )
Donegal – Thanks for reading. Yes, Tuscany is beautiful and definitely worth dealing with spiders for…though scorpions are dangerous…but still….. I’m very grateful I got to do this trip. I hope you’ll get to have your own Tuscan adventure one day, too (hopefully sans scorpions, and with few or no spiders).
Joan – Thanks. And I’m glad you think you could handle this!
Eva – I love how you describe your feelings about living in a city. And I think what you wrote about feeling like the dangers of city life being manageable, is exactly how I feel (even though, of course, some are still really fricking scary). What you said about the sound of the elevated subway reassuring you, warmed my heart.
V. Corso – No no no no no! I promise, Tuscany is totally worth it! Plus, you definitely don’t have to experience it like I did: I’ve been to Tuscany a few times before and have always been city- or town-based, and just gone on excursions into the countryside (for things like wine tastings or visiting small medieval villages) for the day, then gone back. You can totally experience Tuscany that way and it is wonderful. Really.
Bernadine –I just didn’t know how to title this piece differently. All week, that phrase kept coming to mind for me. You’re right – I did have a wonderful time, and many great memories were made. I feel so fortunate to have been able to go on this trip.
steve – Oh no! That is indeed exactly what I’m talking about! Oh nature! When we went on our roadtrip across America a few years ago, we visited Muir Woods, and I was so impressed by the gorgeous and holy-seeming redwoods…but I was unnerved when I got to stand in the trunk of one. I couldn’t imagine all the bugs crawling around me. At least you tried embracing the experience – literally. As for the views, I wanted to post photos that only showed nature (though there’s a small far-off village barely visible in one picture). I realized that the landscape does indeed look similar to several other places, and that made me think the essential Tuscan landscape is probably a mix of nature and lovely old houses or farms or churches. I have a lot of pictures like that and will probably post them, too – maybe with that reflection that this region’s character is as much shaped by nature, as it is by the touch of human beings, be it through agriculture, or architecture.
So funny, that you were checking your apartment for scurrying "friends."
Scorpions...no way. That's the one that'll keep me up all night. Anything else I can look past. No scorpions. One night there was one in my sister's apartment...not a wink of sleep. Not a wink.
Scorpions are beautiful to look at.I once saw a nest of newborn under a stone,they were transparent.
I see your point,though:I'd rather sleep without them being in the same room with me.
Can this place be rented?
Rated for your lovely account on Tuscany's country side.
I know we often feel somehow feebly inferior to our forebears often, but we oughtn’t to.
They didn’t have these immune problems , and probably not these gastro issues, I bet.
I know I am making a leap in supposition, but so what. They also didn’t have our evolved minds. This you write would be incomprehensible heresy. To what? To their less evolved minds. Not talking souls here, understand me: their souls were maybe more developed, certainly more fed with good soul food than ours. We doubt there even is such a thing as a soul.
I am indifferent to nature, I gotta admit..and so what?? I got the genius poet William blake to back me: he admired wordsworth, but thought he was caught in nature’s web. He said, re. nature, “it is a hindrance to me”.
Ok so we gotta often get close to mother .
You put it well: “It seems that loving nature is a matter of balance or detachment. … so many natural inconveniences
she's also hard to have a peaceful relationship with.
I want to love her completely
, but while I know I’ll continue to do whatever I can to preserve and protect her,
I’ll never be able to live with her in harmony.
Last week was probably as close to that as I can ever get. “
Good. A child needs to go off on her own, make her own way, but never ever disrespect or abuse her old mama.
She is not gonna live forever.
They may Not Be too Perfect. We so Flawed.
Hang Undies to dry on Natural Clotheslines.
Never Look at Your Neighbors Under Pants.
If People get Teased `Bout Undies? Poop ay.
I Best reread This Fun` Rant Today. STUPID.
`
Not You. It's the Hazy ` Stoop Days. Summer.
Humid Summer Days ` Make Folk Stupid. OHO.
People Drool. Wither ` Rant. Gripe. O, POUTS.
I've been daydreaming` Busy. No Busy Beaver.
Beaver Busy Myth OHO~`Boo. No Burp. Hicks-
O Cough. Burps Lead To `~Hick-Cup. No`farts.
`
Thank you for sharing your delightful memories.
R♥