Yesterday, my sister and I went downstairs and we made the mistake of looking toward the computer where our dad was. We wanted to gouge our eyes out.

That being said, today I told my mom the whole story and I actually opened up that I don't want to stay HERE in this town anymore and that my friend in Washington said I could live with her and her mom. My mom said that she's fed up with my step dad and even her mom, too, now.

So, with the things I have here, I'm unpacking and re-packing. I'd love to move with my dad down to GA, but with this shit? There's no way in hell. I mean, if you're going to look at that shit, at least have some respect and do it when NOBODY'S HOME!!

I'm using whatever money I get for graduation to buy a car. Then I can either get a job and stay here, or I can mess around this last summer and continue packing and spend it with my friends and then in late summer or fall, if I have money to split the cost of a plane ticket, I'm flying my friend out here and we'll move me to her house. My mom said that people always say you can live with them, but they don't always know what they're getting into. I know this is true. There's a lot to consider and there will be a lot of adjusting to do, but I adjust fairly well and even if it's just for a year or so, it'll be good just to get away.

I'm still searching for the light at the end of this tunnel, but until then, I'll take slow steps. Probably not careful ones - my natural grace gets in the way - but slow.

I just know I'm going to need lots of totes and lots of boxes. And probably lots of packing tape, too. Oh, and motivation. (I just went through ALL my clothes and decided to get rid of some, keep my winter stuff packed up and kept out what I'll be needing. Next is shoes. Then I get to dig out the boxes in my closet that I went through last year or so and go through it again, and all the other misc. stuff I have packed.) I know it's nice to move, but seriously, why do people do it so much? Or, better question, why do they keep so much stuff when they realize it's a pain in the ass to pack and keep organized? And when they realize they don't miss it because they forget they have it? Humans are strange creatures.